| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Kullab |
Posted - 08/23/2011 : 22:38:28
Hello everyone,
I've been having back pain for ten years now and sciatica for one year. After reading Sarno's book sooner this year I had a fantastic recovery and got absolutely free of pain for about two months. That was crazy.
But since yesterday the pain is back, all of the sudden, stronger than ever... I'm under a lot of stress as I'm moving abroad in two weeks : new country, new job, new house, etc. Even if I now this is the reason of my pain, I can't stop it right now.
Has anyone ever been in that situation ? Any idea what could work ?
Thank you very much for your help |
| 12 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Kullab |
Posted - 10/02/2011 : 16:24:57
Hello everyone,
Thank you very much for your help. I finally managed to get rid of the pain again. What helped me ? Three things I suppose :
- Reading you (you gave me some good tips and confidence)
- Re-Reading the Divided Mind
- I took a piece of paper and wrote everything that was making me sad, mad, etc. (all those things listed in the Divided Mind)
I think this last point was the trigger for stopping the pain. As I already told, the pain was stronger than ever, but after I started to write everything I could feel the pain slowly decrease, and by the end of the week I was free of pain.
I hope all of you are doing fine as well.
Salamander, I'm very happy to hear from you and hope you are doing well ! And yes, I played tennis three times last summer. First time I was really anxious, the two other times I hit the ball the stronger I could and felt absolutely no pain. This really helped me in the process of being sure that I have TMS.
Now I believe I must work on myself to try to see the world differently, not being so sensitive to stress, etc. I long way...
Again, thank you very much, all of you, it is fantastic to find such a place on the web were you can talk to nice and bright people. I couldn't have done this without you.
Kullab |
| guej |
Posted - 08/30/2011 : 10:37:29
I go with Dave's advice. I think what happens is that once we overcome pain on a large scale (as you did in the past), we go into absolute panic as soon as a new pain surfaces much more so than someone who has never dealt with an all out chronic pain siege. The dreaded thoughts resurface: "Will this turn into a fullblown pain syndrome"..."Will I be disabled again"..."Oh no...here we go again"....and the fear takes hold and exacerbates what is probably a passing stress response.
I finally accepted the fact that my body reacts to stress by giving me pain in various areas, insomnia, etc. It has taken me 3 years but I am finally at the point where I don't panic when a new pain surfaces. I definitely get annoyed and have my 2 weeks of "oh no...what if this turns into chronic pain again"...and then I re-group and relax, and it goes away. Not always that moment, but it does fade when I get busy living my life as usual and I stop focusing on it. I can't force it away, as is our natural inclination.
The other advice I would offer is just find something that temporarily alleviates pain. I find that when I'm in pain, I focus on it (naturally we do), and thus, it sets in and takes hold. I don't beat myself up for taking some Advil or whatever to get some temporary relief. If I'm not in pain, then I'm not obsessing about it, and the fear is not building, and it passes....Just accept that it may rear it's ugly head for a few days/weeks, and assume it will go away. Just try to make yourself as comfortable as possible so that it doesn't take over your life (or all your waking thoughts). |
| Dave |
Posted - 08/28/2011 : 11:19:00
quote:
Originally posted by Kullab
...Even if I now this is the reason of my pain, I can't stop it right now.
Do not expect that you can "stop it" even if you believe you know the emotional trigger. You cannot control the TMS process.
Since you are aware of the likely trigger, continue to think about the deeper emotional effects of this major life change. Try to uncover deeper feelings that you might not be fully appreciating on the surface. How does the "child inside" feel about everything going on in your life right now?
The fact that you had success treating your pain as TMS in the past should serve to reinforce the belief that it is TMS again. You cannot make the pain go away. It could take days or weeks. All you can do is continue to think about the difficult emotional issues you are experiencing right now, instead of focusing on the pain, and trust that the pain will subside on its own. |
| art |
Posted - 08/27/2011 : 16:26:22
I'd change TT's probability figure to 98 percent. It's really virtually certain that it's TMS given what you've told us.
For many to most, there is no cure. TMS is chronic, but manageable. In moments of stress it can always come back. I'm dealing with recurring pain right now myself. It scares me for a second, or a minute, but you learn to deal with that fear. In my experience, that's the bottom line. As soon as I stop worrying, the pain disappears. |
| salamander |
Posted - 08/25/2011 : 12:55:27
Kullab,
Glad to hear that you recovered for two months! That should prove to you that there was nothing wrong with your back. Now...this is the hard part....
Have you started to play tennis again? Other sports? Remember that Sarno indicates that you are not fully "cured" until you resume all normal activity and no longer fear sports.
You are having a relapse where the mind is trying to convince you that you are hurt. The writing is on the wall...these latest stressors should be proof that you are in full TMS mode.
My advice...go with the flow. All your concerns and fears will probably not happen. Try and enjoy the ride. I think it would be fun and exciting to start a new lease on life. As you become increasingly busy, I think the pain will decrease.
Regards,
Doug |
| jjh2go |
Posted - 08/25/2011 : 11:36:56
Sometimes therapy is required, and sometimes, acceptance isn't enough. My hands went tingly during one of my therapy sessions, when I was digging up some of those repressed emotions, and my back started hurting. After I experienced them, the symptoms subsided, and I got a little better. Right now I'm grieving the loss of my brother from when I was 4 years old. That was a long time ago, but it was something that I never did. Now I'm finally experiencing it, and draining my reservoir. |
| Craig Clark |
Posted - 08/25/2011 : 09:35:29
I wanted to add as well that what you have faced is really really stressful for anyone. Even when you are doing everything right you are likely having to put yourself under many pressures. I can tell you also that moving from one country to another has grief associated with it. Like a death. How can we not realize this? What I wanted to say is the pressure we put on ourselves from our personalities is one of the three working against us. I am a perfectionist and I am a pleaser. I have a family that followed us from the US to Japan and now to western Germany. We miss the first two places a lot and have voiced our being upset about it. Our inner child likes what it is used to seeing (most of the time). My inner child has been uphappy many times about me moving my family to a place we don't always like. It is irrational and doesn't always care about the great places we get to see or the extra money we will make doing it. Go back in and have a good talk with your unconconcious. Give it hell as they say. See yourself (conconcious) as growing bigger and bigger if you need to punch it in the face then do so but get it's attention. Tell it to relax the back and that he is losing power so give up. See yourself growing and him shrinking. Bathe your body in the blood you were born in. The warm blood full of the stuff your body needs. Tell it to relax the muscles and do some deep deep breathing. You will my friend get past this. Believe me. |
| tennis tom |
Posted - 08/25/2011 : 06:21:24
quote:
Originally posted by Kullab
...I believe the inner child in me is facing all kinds of trouble and is very scared.
...I've also been putting a lot of pressure on myself these last months, working hard days and nights, and my "id" is probably rebelling against that.
...I believe now it never really goes away.
...The think is that I believe I am being positive with what's going on in my life (which was not the case before I knew I have TMS), but I'm still very very anxious.
...Now, the pain is so strong that I'm beginning to doubt about TMS. What if I was wrong ? But I can't let this happen. So I'm gonna read "The Divided Mind" again, try to relax and
...dig into my deep feelings, because there are so many changes in my life that I can't figure out which one may be the greatest cause of my anxiety or anger.
Sorry to hear about your pain, Kullab. I will speak on the assumption that you have TMS, the percentages are 80% or more that's what it is. You're in France and I'm in frisco (Mill Valley actually), but I'll be sleeping at a Holiday Inn Express tonight--(a Best Werstern actually) or camping in the back of my Jeep. I'm packin' up headin' up to Oregun to romp around barefoot on grass--(playing in a grass court tennis tournament that is). But, I digress in my irrational exuberance that's keeping me awake, excited about my road trip--road trip--road trip!
Sorry for my momentary loss of empathy, that IS purported to be my problem here--and it's clear to see why at the moment. Let me see if I can escape my lapse into narcissism and get back to your problem Kullab. Your PROBLEM right now is fear that there is something structurally wrong with you and that you are doing more damage. The percentages say NOT. Too bad there are so few TMS docs on the planet and I've never heard of one in France--Freud's dead and Vienna's a ways away.
TMS is all about the HOMEOSTASIS! Your inner child, gremlin, of a subconscious does not like change from the surroundings and routine you've accustomed the bugger to--it's the one who's afraid. TMS occurs whether the change is for the bad--or strangely, for the GOOD! In the Rahe-Holmes list in my sig below you earn points toward TMS pain for paying OFF a mortgage as well as taking one out!
You beat back TMS a little while ago and made the pain miraculously disappear. Unless you've fallen out of a four story building in the meantime, you haven't done anything to injure it. Backs and bodies are strong!, a la Sarno.
You don't have to dig deep into your psyche at this point. In fact that would probably be counterproductive trying to dredge up the black bullet of pain in your past. This may add to your mind pain and result in a fit of tautological psychobabbling. You just need to absorb the Good Doctor's "knowledge penicillin" on a cellular level and sleep on it. TMS recovery is about ACCEPTANCE of the concept and not long term therapy. You were functional enough to get to France, get a job, and a place to live in. That's pretty functional! I doubt if you need the funny farm, maybe a few days on the beach for some R&R.
Susceptibility to TMS doesn't go away, because it's part of the Human Condition. Unless you've had a lobotomy or something--how are you going to get rid of your subconscious?--it's always in the background, that's why it's your subconscious.
Your RESERVOIR OF RAGE is overflowing at the moment so curling-up with a TMS book is an excellent idea or if you can't sit on your butt, take a walk around the block or go for a swim.
In Dr. Sarno's latest book, he theorizes that TMS is a PROTECTOR, a defense mechanism from having to face scary emotional situations that the subconscious intuits we're not ready for. Maybe kick-back and let it do it's job or deal with the issues head-on and gain mind confidence for future TMS pain episodes. You may want to take a look at some of the TMS tools in my sig for some help too.
Cheers and Au Revoir, I'm going back to sleep.
tt
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DR. SARNO'S 12 DAILY REMINDERS:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0dKBFwGR0g
TAKE THE HOLMES-RAHE STRESS TEST
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and_Rahe_stress_scale
Some of my favorite excerpts from _THE DIVIDED MIND_ :
http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=2605
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society." Jiddu Krishnamurti
"Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional." Author Unknown
"Happy People Are Happy Putters." Frank Nobilo, Golf Analyst
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| Kullab |
Posted - 08/25/2011 : 01:52:56
Hello you 3,
Thank you very much for your support. This morning the pain is stronger than ever, I can't even sit, which never happened to me before. I really can't believe it cause still 3 days ago I was completely free of pain.
Everything you wrote makes sense. I believe the inner child in me is facing all kinds of trouble and is very scared. I've also been putting a lot of pressure on myself these last months, working hard days and nights, and my "id" is probably rebelling against that. I was not cautious enough, I thought I was 100% free from TMS but I believe now it never really goes away. You can probably get rid of the pain if you keep being positive and work on yourself but if you forget it, it will come back stronger than ever. Or maybe I still have some work to do in psychotherapy, I don't know.
The think is that I believe I am being positive with what's going on in my life (which was not the case before I knew I have TMS), but I'm still very very anxious.
Now, the pain is so strong that I'm beginning to doubt about TMS. What if I was wrong ? But I can't let this happen. So I'm gonna read "The Divided Mind" again, try to relax and dig into my deep feelings, because there are so many changes in my life that I can't figure out which one may be the greatest cause of my anxiety or anger.
Again, thank you very much for being here |
| Craig Clark |
Posted - 08/24/2011 : 11:39:42
Kullab-I wanted to say that I can relate to some of what you are talking about. Reading your post and the other encouraging replies I think are on spot. Moving overseas and all that goes with it can exacerbate things a bit. I will tell you that we live overseas AND bought a house AND started a new job all at the same time. This sent me over the edge. I can say that there is light at the end of the tunnel and you have to know that the fact that you have TMS is that light. Have you bought the Mind/Body Prescription DVD? I bought it and watched it with my wife along with all of the other things. I have, like other suggested, read and reread everything I had. I will also say that my TMS is pretty stubborn. Maybe some people's TMS is milder and more willing but mine isn't. It wants to linger and be in control. I had my son draw me a sword the other day and color it and cut it out. I laminated it (it's small but lethal) and carry it with me in my pocket. I am an educator and know that the more modalities you use while learning and relearning something will have more chances of becoming permanent. To see this little sword. To feel this little sword. Not to taste it of course. You get it right? I know it seems silly but when I am down in that dark cold basement mentioned in the 6 week plan I see myself using it to do some serious thrashing. Let me tell you I am kickin some tail. Also today was a particularly stressful day for me and my issue is my back tenses up and then the pain starts and then I have to tell myself to release the blood with all the oxygen to bathe the muscles, tendons, and all areas from head to toe in order for it to relax. Crazy thing is I took the same principle from above and went to buy some of those large marshmallows. I kept them in the bag (of course I ate two) and began to visualize and talk to myself about how I wanted the muscles to relax like the marshmallows in between my fingers. I did some serious breathing and again the oxygen (remember this is all it really is and it is MILD) began to flow because I told it to with a sword in my hand. Yes...I did hit the little evil one trying to be in control but you don't mess with a sword swingin'/marshmallow feelin' dude when he is trying to get some control. What are you angry about? That child don't want to move and is having to do something it doesn't want to do. That's my guess. Go back in to yourself and have a very firm discussion with your child and do some butt kickin' cause you are in the charge. |
| balto |
Posted - 08/24/2011 : 08:07:14
quote:
Originally posted by Kullab
Hello everyone,
I've been having back pain for ten years now and sciatica for one year. After reading Sarno's book sooner this year I had a fantastic recovery and got absolutely free of pain for about two months. That was crazy.
But since yesterday the pain is back, all of the sudden, stronger than ever... I'm under a lot of stress as I'm moving abroad in two weeks : new country, new job, new house, etc. Even if I now this is the reason of my pain, I can't stop it right now.
Has anyone ever been in that situation ? Any idea what could work ?
Thank you very much for your help
I would suggest that you reread the book. Reconfirm to your brain that the pain is from physical causes. Do what you did the last time you got rid of your pain symptoms month ago. Examine your current stressful situation and see what you can do to improve it or to change how you feel about it. Replace your negative thoughts about the situation with positive or realistic thoughts.
New country: you're lucky. Million of people wish they can go places and they can't. You got to travel, to see new places, new cultures, meet new people. Open up your mind, improve your knowledge of the world...
New job: Man! in this economy you're fortunate to have a job. You should be proud of yourself that you are the choosen one. You have the skill needed to get a job. You have what it take to get a job. You smart enough to get a job....
New house: Again, you are fortunate to get a new house. Million of people don't have a house. Million more lost their house in the financial crisis. What about those million refugee around the world?
Big changes to your life is always challenging, scary sometime due to the unknowns that could happen. But if you have to make the change then why not embrace it instead of dread it. Dream positive dream instead of worry of what could happen.
Two men looking out from the prison window. One saw the mud, the other saw the stars.
It's all about your thought of the situation. Happy thoughts, positive thoughts make the body healthy and your mind at peace.
goodluck. |
| tennis tom |
Posted - 08/24/2011 : 08:04:09
Hi Kullab,
Since Alexis is on vacation let me fill in the breach. From the sounds of your post you get it, a veil of pain for years, almost miraculously lifted by reading a book. You've made the logical TMS association, the return of your pain with the major life changes you are embarking on--a subconscious attack to your homeostasis, your normal routine. The gremlin lurking in the dark of your subconscious is not happy with having to move and find new dark recesses to hide in, it's scared and angry.
Your body is rebelling on a cellular level. As to what you can do, why not do what worked for you before? Curl-up with a good TMS book, audio or video tape, there are plenty out there, and get a booster shot of TMS "penicillin knowledge", as the Good Doctor calls it. Making the pain disappear will get easier as your mind gets stronger and your confidence grows, that you can do it without reliance on a system of medicine that doesn't know you and increasingly doesn't care to know you. I feel my car gets more TLC from my mechanic, than a patient does on our assembly line new health systems. You may want to check out some of the tools in my sig. below. Good luck!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DR. SARNO'S 12 DAILY REMINDERS:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0dKBFwGR0g
TAKE THE HOLMES-RAHE STRESS TEST
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and_Rahe_stress_scale
Some of my favorite excerpts from _THE DIVIDED MIND_ :
http://www.tmshelp.com/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=2605
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society." Jiddu Krishnamurti
"Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional." Author Unknown
"Happy People Are Happy Putters." Frank Nobilo, Golf Analyst
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