| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| healingback |
Posted - 03/28/2011 : 11:13:50
So the fatigue is back , not the tiredness you can push through. . The I can barely lift my arms come the afternoon tiredness.. so if this is tms. .. has anyone ever cured there fatigue? How do you simply challenge tiredness?
This to shall pass.... |
| 12 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Back2-It |
Posted - 04/19/2011 : 05:48:20
Healingback,
I feel for you.
I was always the one who took on the sick ones, because I was the only "single" one and had the most time and lived the closest. In retrospect it colored and hurt my entire life in ways that are now only becoming clear.
I don't think you can afford to be guilty about the rage. Admit it. Shout it out if you have to. Allow yourself to be as angry as you should be. MOST IMPORTANT, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT AND SAVE YOURSELF!
I should never -- I repeat never-- gone to the extent I did with my final sick relative, my uncle, because of anger towards him. I should have insisted that the others step up more and spend time with him, not just taxi him to the ER and hospital.
You can only deal with what you can, and you know what, it's only fair. You do have a life. As I said, I am angry to this day that I didn't confront those who could have stepped up more and done something. I think it contributed, if not caused, my physical problems.
I don't know if your mother can be forced to join the caring more, but you may have to either make her or make her suffer some of the guilt by backing off and taking care of yourself. Your mother is the one who made the vow "in sickness and in health". Time to see if she has the stuff. Cruel to say, maybe, but true in life. Her abdication of her duties is why she does not have TMS. But you know what, if and when your father passes, your anger will be directed squarely at her for this failure and cause you even more anger and regret that you didn't speak up adult to adult at this critical time.
I had to do some of that in the latter months of my uncle being sick. I was in too much pain, and guess what, nobody --NOBODY-- was helping me. I remember shouting out to myself all alone that "Nobody knew how sick I was!". I was having the weird TMS pains but I also had a diseased gallbladder inside of me the size of a summer squash that had pushed out my entire right chest. It later brought me to the hospital for emergency surgery. Did my uncle visit? He could have, as he was in a recovery/remission stage and getting out to the racetrack. But NO. He did not visit. Gives you a clue, no? People pleasing and being a goodist will get you only one fourth the return in rewards. And it does come down to that, believe me.
It's called survival. It's called dealing with the stressors. It's called taking a decision and letting the chips fall, but trying to reclaim YOUR life.
In the end, I walked out of my uncle's nursing home in anger. He was very sick, but still shouting at me like some sort of pig. Maybe if I were healthy myself I could have overlooked it. He felt badly and tried to call me later in the week, but then he suddenly died. I never took his call. Do I feel badly about that? Somewhat, but, dammit, I did enough. And he knew it, too. He knew I was in pain and felt horrible about it.
I -- me-- was the person who kept taking more abuse. Heap it on, I could take it. I was being the saint whilst the others were not so saintly. No, as Art says below, the others -- my sisters-- were being normal humans.
Try to save yourself. All this TMS work will not do beans unless you make some kind of peace with your current situation. My opinion, of course.
God bless you for looking after your father, but God bless you and look after yourself. Your life is a gift just as precious your mothers and your fathers. It's the only damned life you've got.
Sorry to be so raging and opinionated about this, but this is people pleasing, goodist behavior to the hilt. I know; I lived it.
Tell me to buzz out and off, but I just had to say it. I have no business going off like this, but I just can't help it. Sorry again.
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| art |
Posted - 04/19/2011 : 05:37:50
It's called being human. |
| healingback |
Posted - 04/18/2011 : 23:19:32
Yeh its most definitely rage inducing, but to be honest I feel alittle guilty admitting that, but I do feel Like im having to live his life and then try and get on with my own on the side. My dad wasn't the best father growing up either, always out gambling away what little money we had. And I think the knife got stuck in deep when my brother died when I was 13 and GE turned to my mum and said don't expect any support with This I can't handle it.... but now im supposed to, im only 27. Rage, and then a circle of guilt for feeling angry at someone who's so ill. Angry at my brother for leaving me to deal with it, and at my mum for also sticking her head in the sand... How she doesn't have tms I don't know.
This to shall pass.... |
| shannclapp |
Posted - 04/18/2011 : 17:22:53
Healingback, i understand your pain, mom has had MS since I was 10 yrs old. Had to take care of a lot of things including my younger sister. I now see this as a big rage casuer. Hang in there. I know when my energy levels are down, usually from stress workouts help me a lot. |
| art |
Posted - 04/18/2011 : 16:31:27
quote:
Originally posted by healingback
Hi Anne, I do have alot on my plate my dads has progressive multiple scelorisis and so I am dealing with all his care workers, power of attorney stuff... its alit to take on particular as my mum wants nothing to do with it as he wasn't a great husband so it falls on my shoulders. Its one of those situations that I can't get away from and can't change. Which in turn creates rage therefore tms.
This to shall pass....
This is one of the most stressful, rage-inducing situations imaginable. No wonder you've got symptoms.
I've got to take care of my increasingly senile mother because my brothers can't or won't. She was not shall we say a warm and positive presence when I was growing up, and it's just very hard to let all that stuff go. As soon is set foot in her little assisted living apartment, my chest starts to burn.
You don't have to stop being angry, but it should help quite a bit to understand and appreciate how much stress you're under, and how likely it is that your symptoms are at least partly related to the situation... |
| Back2-It |
Posted - 04/18/2011 : 14:46:18
quote:
Originally posted by healingback
Hi Anne, I do have alot on my plate my dads has progressive multiple scelorisis and so I am dealing with all his care workers, power of attorney stuff... its alit to take on particular as my mum wants nothing to do with it as he wasn't a great husband so it falls on my shoulders. Its one of those situations that I can't get away from and can't change. Which in turn creates rage therefore tms.
This to shall pass....
Oh, crap. I forgot you had all this on the program.
I had to do that with my uncle, who was a drunk earlier in life and treated everybody like garbage. I had three years of dealing with his intense illnesses and about ten years prior to that dealing with lessor ones. My sister helped a bit, but she never was at his house and only took him every other time to the ER and hospital.
Yes, rage! Get the rage out if you can. Somehow.
I ended up getting my pain problem about one year prior to his passing, and no matter how much pain I was in I still had to do this and that and spend countless hours at his house and at the hospitals and running him here and there. Towards the end he said he appreciated my effort, but I still felt rage and resentment.
I'm so sorry. |
| healingback |
Posted - 04/18/2011 : 14:09:43
Hi Anne, I do have alot on my plate my dads has progressive multiple scelorisis and so I am dealing with all his care workers, power of attorney stuff... its alit to take on particular as my mum wants nothing to do with it as he wasn't a great husband so it falls on my shoulders. Its one of those situations that I can't get away from and can't change. Which in turn creates rage therefore tms.
This to shall pass.... |
| Scottydog |
Posted - 04/18/2011 : 13:38:47
HB, What is going on in your life?
Are you feeling overwhelmed by something that you have to do or are expected to do?
We moved to a house with a huge garden (also a huge house). A lovely house, and I had always claimed to love gardening but I realised that I felt exhausted and weak when I went to work in the garden. The work seemed just too much and impossible to get on top of.
It's a horrible feeling but my body was just reacting to my emotions. I also had alot of family problems, sick elderly parents etc, so things were getting too much and were beyond my control.
Perhaps some emotional pressure is triggering your fatigue.
Anne |
| Darko |
Posted - 03/28/2011 : 18:16:12
I feel tired and low on energy if I have had a bad nights sleep due to pain.
I drink the following every morning
- vital greens http://www.vitalgreens.com/
- life springs colloidal minerals http://www.lifesprings.com.au/colloidal.html
- chia seeds
- usually a fresh fruit juice and a handful of nuts
- sometimes blanched broccoli
- L-Tyrosine
- 5HTP
This has made a MASSIVE difference to my energy and mood levels. Don't forget, when you're energy is down you tend not to cope so well mentally either.
The above routine gets the nutrition factor sorted......if I still feel crap then it's likely to be just cause I'm very tired or it's emotional
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| art |
Posted - 03/28/2011 : 14:41:18
Low blood sugar will definitely cause fatigue as Susan points out. Profound fatigue is generally physical in nature and should be checked out. But low blood sugar will generally not show up in blood tests. It's more about peaks and valleys then absolute levels anyway. Doctors are no help, unless you're diabetic.
Try eating when you feel like this, and see what happens. Something that won't cause a big spike in blood sugar....nuts, cheese, proteins....Not carbs....You should get prompt relief if that's what it is.
Hope that helps... |
| susan828 |
Posted - 03/28/2011 : 14:09:03
A lot of it may have to do with your blood sugar level. The formula is that 6 grams of protein keeps your blood sugar up for about an hour. I make sure to have about 20 grams of protein for breakfast even if I am not hungry. Then more protein....just try to keep the level up all day. You know about sleep...look up your requirements for your age, try to go to bed at the same time every night. Lots of water. I do all this but sometimes I just need a long nap during the day, from boredom, depression or no reason that I know. I was like that yesterday, how you describe and I had had 9 hours of sleep. Sometimes there isn't an answer but really, keep an eye on your nutrition, that may be the cause. |
| kenny V |
Posted - 03/28/2011 : 13:13:05
Not sure where you are at and if this applies. But it seems you may have to look at what is your biggest issue that is keeping the focus on yourself and work on them one by one.
If that does not aply then get the energy to go out and exercise get some sun and smell the fresh air. Get lots of sun esp this time of year. Don’t stay up late and sleep when its dark .
Cuz lack of D for a long time will do it too. Each day continue this till you start to feel better. Take care of your self , eat right and exercise is the best advice besides doing The TMS homework.
Help people who need help and not to focus on yourself. Often times this is helpful when you are depressed tired. If not depression than you may want to investigate more into what causes the tiredness that you are having
Imo always answers available if ya ask the right Q’s.
HTH
Kenny v
Always Hope For Recovery
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