| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| scottjmurray |
Posted - 04/30/2009 : 11:35:32
I thought that this might be helpful to some as an example for how to end a TMS episode using anger release methods:
So last night I ended up hanging out with an old girlfriend from high school and we ended up sleeping together. The entire day I was spot f-cking on, feeling good, genuine and in tune with who I was. When I left my superego (I think I'm going to change the term on my website from ego to superego) asserted itself because I hadn't fully dealt with my emotional issues surrounding this kind of thing.
On my car ride home I was SCREAMING in agony as I was hit by wave and wave of emotional ghosts (my parents, my peers, my teachers, my old girlfriends, ideas I had collected about reality, etc). Eventually I passed out in my bed as my brain began to stabilize again.
I woke up about an hour ago and it had reasserted itself yet again, this time I was getting WORKED by my old TMS manifestations. I was like "oh f-ck." I went to go take a shower and ended up collapsing and growling for I don't even know how long before the rage finally broke. Something to the tune of "it's because I feel like I have to do something about this" popped into my head and a wave of relief finally came. But that's not the end of the story.
You see, the superego is a little bastard that won't die until you let it. The remainder of my shower was spent sitting against the back and feeling my brain coming to pieces as the ghosts rose and fell. After about 10 minutes of this it started to subside.
I'm not completely okay right now, but the rage part already broke, which is the big part. Now that I've got my head around the bastard it won't be long before it fades away.
Alright so let's review:
Step 1: Situation that provokes emotional content that you haven't dealt with properly
Step 2: Extreme anguish and pain as your superego asserts itself
Step 3: "Rage break" where you no longer feel like you need to obey the superego
Step 4: It'll feel like your brain is short circuiting as the little bits and pieces of the construct blip in and out of your awareness
Step 5: Relief.
~*~
author of tms-recovery . com |
| 2 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Webdan65 |
Posted - 05/01/2009 : 17:58:41
Scott:
What's amazing is that by knowing what is going on - you ride the wave and when it's done - it's done.
If someone without knowledge of TMS had that episode, they'd be scared stiff for weeks or months - going to doctors and really letting the fear take over.
Thanks for the story. Way cool that you're feeling great now!
Dan |
| scottjmurray |
Posted - 04/30/2009 : 15:27:10
By the way i feel f-cking awesome now.
~*~
author of tms-recovery . com |
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