| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Paul |
Posted - 10/14/2008 : 17:44:52
I just want to know how many of you handle the pain from TMS when it is REALLY bad? I try to not let it get my attention, but it does..and most of all, I find myself raging inside and moody even around those I love (like family). It just makes me feel super angry like I want to scream or beat a punching bag to death. I just get REALLY pissed off at the pain and what it is doing to me that I want to lift a car (seriously, it hurts that bad).
Isn't just ignoring the pain repressing it because pain DOES cause rage inside, especially when it is really bad. I honestly don't see how people could say otherwise.
Thoughts or ideas? Sorry for all my posts lately...I'm really in a funk. |
| 10 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| mizlorinj |
Posted - 10/15/2008 : 14:01:19
Paul, there has got to be something else there or you would not have pain. Perhaps explore where these personality traits originated? Things stated or IMPLIED by parents or friends, etc. are replayed in our minds. These thoughts become beliefs. These can be causing pain.
Example of how thoughts can cause pain: Last November my cute guy had decided he was not, for the first time in 20 years, going to his mother's for Thanksgiving. It is now Wed morning and he is telling me his how shoulder aches. Thought maybe he lifted too much weight, etc. I thought about this and said lovingly "did you tell your mother you're not going there yet?" No, he had not. So I said, well if it still hurts in a few days, you know it wasn't the weights. I saw him later on Wed and asked how he was feeling. He said "oh, I called my mother. the shoulder pain was gone as soon as I hung up the phone." So something this simple can cause pain in our body. I love that story and he now loves retelling it when someone thinks their pain could not be emotionally-caused! 
I actually see what you listed as topics that you could journal about; perhaps writing and answering WHY could help you delve a little deeper:
*Self insecurity WHY???
*Worrying about future WHY? You live in the PRESENT. The past is gone (tough to reckon with, trust me) and the future isn't here nor in our control
*Self image WHY--where did this come from?
We are born loving ourselves. What has happened since.
Best wishes,
L |
| Paul |
Posted - 10/15/2008 : 13:54:29
Trust me, I've journaled and journaled.
I really don't see that something happened to me or anything. The only thing that stands out is my personality traits. The main ones...
*Self insecurity
*Worrying about future
*Self image
But now that I have acknowledged these things, and I work on not beating myself up, etc. and working on self-confidence...the pain still remains.
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| mizlorinj |
Posted - 10/15/2008 : 12:31:06
Dr. Sarno told me, as I laid on his floor in agony, that even cancer would not be hurting me this badly. So yes, TMS is sometimes unbelieveably bad pain. I was bedbound for at least 3 weeks with it. (physical people would blame the herniated disc--but I didn't "fix" the disc and got better anyway)
I did take vicodin, but how funny is it that only the first one worked. Or rather I believed it would work so it did. After that, pain returned, pills didn't do anything to help. So I read his books, treatment plan, and journaled about a lot of stuff. In a couple days I did feel some relief. Then more, then more. I let stuff out that I knew I needed to (grieve mother's death from 1999, anger at ex-husband, etc.) and stopped putting it off. It worked.
If you feel you need painkillers, take them. Find one that works for you. It should (ugh--hate that word) work at least a few times before your brain wises up. LOL
If someone's pain keeps returning or continuing, they need to get something off them. There is something in there that needs acknowledgement, reckoning. . .acceptance. . . forgiveness, etc. You never know what you'll dredge up. This brings fear of course, fear of facing something, but doing so is HEALING to the mind AND body. 
Anyone interested in suggestions as to topics, email me and I can give you lots of ideas of things that could be bothersome. At least one will probably resonate 4 u. |
| Dave |
Posted - 10/15/2008 : 09:07:14
quote:
Originally posted by Paul
It just makes me feel super angry like I want to scream or beat a punching bag to death.
So do it!
Keep in mind that your anger "at the pain" is misdirected. It is a smokescreen for the real emotions that are the root of the symptoms.
If you allow yourself to get angry and really let those emotions fly (in private, of course) then maybe you can clear the smoke and get in touch with what is really bothering you down deeper.
That said, you also have to accept the symptoms as a benign signal to address your emotional state. Acceptance is an important tool in thwarting the brain's strategy to distract you. |
| pandamonium |
Posted - 10/15/2008 : 03:36:04
Hi Paul,
I had a bad episode in April, drove all the way home crying, screaming at myself, hitting the seat next to me, must have looked a right state. I was just so angry that even though I understood TMS I could still be in that much pain. Then I tried a couple of things: talking to my inner child and reassuring her that no matter how bad things got I'd always be there for her and making peace with my TMS, ie deciding not to fight it. I read somewhere that you can't fight TMS, it's a battle you'll never win but if you accept it then you take away it's power over you.
Then I took pain killers and tried to ignore it until it subsided.
Panda |
| scottjmurray |
Posted - 10/15/2008 : 02:07:08
if the pain is bad and it's pissing you off that's fine. get pissed off. feeling agitated is agitating. you'll feel a lot better when you stop trying to control yourself so much and you can let it all hang out.
the back of my tongue hurt a couple nights ago and it was really pissing me off. i knew it was tms but god damn it hurt. i started to get really agitated and i went into my room and just screamed for like 4 or 5 minutes and spent the next hour bitching about it with my friend (while bitching about other things of course). after a few hours i had forgotten about it totally and it was gone. i was pissed about some other stuff (personality stuff usually), but i won that battle.
anyway, point is it's okay to be mad. actually that's the whole thing you're supposed to take away from this tms ordeal is that it's okay to feel and you don't have to force anything.
---
author of tms-recovery . com
(not sh!t, champagne)
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| winnieboo |
Posted - 10/14/2008 : 18:56:20
Sorry you're in a funk. Hang in there; we've all been there.
quote:
Isn't just ignoring the pain repressing it because pain DOES cause rage inside, especially when it is really bad. I honestly don't see how people could say otherwise.
Think about what you're saying here, and put your car in reverse. You may be feeling rage and pain at the same time, but Sarno would say the rage is what's causing the pain. It's not the other way around.
I know exactly what you mean, though, and we've all been where you are too. It's infuriating and depressing to be in pain. But, when you begin to focus on emotions, even if the only thing you can get at is super colossal anger, you'll invariably find many other additional emotional factors bolstering that fury. Explore those and you'll likely get relief. In the meantime, while your on your way to your journal, therapist or computer to write here, try to tell yourself to stay calm, if you can. Over time, I've found that if I meditate, watch a funny movie, spend time with my kids or my pets, I relax enough that the edge comes off the pain and I can deal with everything a little better. |
| hkp |
Posted - 10/14/2008 : 18:42:36
One more suggestion:
Read Dr. Schubiner's 10/2 blog post: it's about the process of how the brain takes fear and rage in response to pain, and turns it into more pain. It's also about mindfulness :o)
http://www.yourpainisreal.com/blog/dealing-with-doubt-thoughts-and-emotions-mbs-blog-14/#more-18
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| hkp |
Posted - 10/14/2008 : 18:33:47
Hi Paul:
I've been dealing with pelvic issues since around May myself, and I understand how extra-special awful they can be. I've been feeling better lately - still not 100%, but maybe 75% - and one of the things that helped me was taking a mindfulness and meditation class through my health care provider - Kaiser.
I found that when I let the pain take control and spin me, it just got worse and worse and worse. Partially as a result of some of the postings on this board and partially as a result of the class, I have become better at breathing deeply and repeatedly and going, "Ah. This feels bad right now. It really does. But it may not be like this tomorrow. Or in an hour. I'm just going to be with it - not fight it, just be." And often, things will resolve.
An example, today, I was having a rough day with work, and was walking down the street when I tripped over an uneven piece of sidewalk and fell down really hard on my wrists and knees. I'm pretty achy! But in the past, I would have catastrophised about how this was going to turn into L/T knee or wrist pain. Now, I'm just like, "yeah, this hurts, but I know why, and I've iced it and taken some Motrin, and I've done all I can do right now. I don't want to think about what this means for the future. Probably nothing."
I know, disgustingly Zen. But it is helping. So I throw it out there for your consideration.
hkp |
| RageSootheRatio |
Posted - 10/14/2008 : 18:24:13
When the pain is really bad, I take meds, usually something with codeine. :o)
I also always review this which I had copied this from a post some time ago (sorry, not sure who posted this):
"Sometimes all you can do is ride out a pain episode. I saw Dr. Sarno in the early 1990's. During one of his lectures, someone asked him what to do when you had a severe pain attack. He replied, with a twinkle in his eye, "go to bed with a good book and a bottle of wine".
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