| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Logan |
Posted - 07/25/2008 : 12:51:45
Hi all,
I don't know how useful anyone else will find this post but I wanted to share this. So, I've been pain free for 4+ years. My success story is on that thread if you're interested. By pain free, I mean I might get the occasional twinge or cramp somewhere but can head it off at the figurative pass and I live an active, healthy, no chronic pain life.
Some times are harder than others to maintain this pain free status. Such as now, my dad was just diagnosed with bone marrow cancer - right as I'm back in therapy (in order to get more psychologically healthy) really digging deep in my childhood "stuff" and feeling a lot of anger and sorrow toward both parents for their neglect of me and dependence on me when I should have been able to depend more on them. My husband's cousin was just killed in a car accident. School is about to start up again and I'm a teacher and have huge anxiety around this...
At times like this I stay very on top of what I'm feeling and thinking. But I know that it's hard for my subconscious to deal when all this **** is hitting the fan at the same time. So, instead of fighting the symptom imperative tooth and nail, I let it "have" one symptom as a kind of pressure valve. I let it have the one I had as a child - hives. I said, "okay, you can have the 'stress rash.'"
I've said this before and usually just saying that, it's enough pressure off my mindbody that it'll give me one or two hives here and there and that's it. Well, right now it's giving me a few on each hand and foot. And it itches like a mofo. But it's kind of making me laugh. It's really making me see that I need to take better care of myself and get more honest about how disturbed I am by my dad's illness. I definitely see the stress rash as a canary in the coal mine kind of thing. I know it's TMS. It's not disturbing. It's just a graphic sign that I need to do my homework...
Not sure what this means for anyone else, like I said. But it's interesting to me. |
| 3 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| moose1 |
Posted - 07/25/2008 : 14:44:43
yep, i get hives, especially on my palms, elbows and the bottoms of my feet. i've been in therapy for anxiety for the past two and a half months, and on days when the anxiety wanes, i always get a substitute symptom. lately it's been the hives and - most silly of all - muscle twitching. it's amazing how unconscious emotions can be the root of something as debilitating and horrific as anxiety and as goofy as itchy hands/feet and twitchy muscles. i'll take the twitchy muscles any day.
i am also doing the digging through of childhood (and adult) junk involving my parents and making parallels between that and my current life. the part of me that causes the symptoms - gremlin, inner bastard, TMS, whatever you wanna call it - sure doesn't like it when you put the spotlight on it, that's for sure.
best of luck,
Moose |
| joli |
Posted - 07/25/2008 : 14:25:12
Interesting way of talking to your brain.
It is amazing how your brain so wants to distract you from the emotional pain , it is like a maladaptive defense mechanism.
Which is no surprise if you had to learn your way of dealing with life with parents that were not parenting but Dependant.
Stay psychological.
 even if it gives you a black eye.
I think therefore I am. |
| mizlorinj |
Posted - 07/25/2008 : 13:12:34
Logan, thanks for sharing. I think it's interesting how you give yourself permission to have a hive or two! Cool! I get a hive occasionally too and I'm sure they're stress-related somehow. They always go away in 15 minutes or so; I'm not afraid of them.
I agree with getting things out to be "psychologically healthy." Nicely put! I still do journaling or "cycles" out loud to get stuff off me. And I ALWAYS feel better afterward! Lighter in fact.
Best wishes to you!
-Lori |
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