| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| Sarah Jacoba |
Posted - 04/30/2008 : 22:26:37
Hi everyone,
I've been quiet on the forum for awhile (no news is good news), but I had an experience recently that was very powerful for me and felt I owed it to other to share.
I injured my thumb around Christmas 2006 playing a style of guitar at a show that involves slapping the fretboard (if you've seen August Rush you know what I mean). It has hurt, just a little bit off and on since then, not enough to be bothersome. I often find (you can see this in my posting history) that in the spring my activities intensify and I end up w/ arm and hand pains. So this year, my thumb started feeling sore and hurt whenever I put pressure on it. Usually TMS for me is constant irritation or pain, so I connected this in my mind to the 2006 injury instead, and started babying it. Within a couple weeks, it got very painful and as a guitarist I started worrying. The pattern of the thing just seemed unusual and different from my prior TMS experiences (which are numerous -- you can read my posts).
But I've dealt w/ TMS enough to still be suspicious, and I went back to the forum and reread all my own posts and every other post dealing with thumb and hand pain. That was enough to push me to challenge my belief it was an injury. So I went outside and threw the ball for the dog about two weeks ago with one of those Chuckit things -- something that had been increasingly painful. And it hurt bad. Usually with TMS, I feel better during activity and hurt later. But every time I put downward pressure on my hand to pick up the ball, it hurt worse. Pushing through that for an hour took alot of bravery (it felt like stupidity at the time). I was fully expecting to go inside and pay for my stupidity. I ran my hand under warm water for awhile and was surprised to find it felt better. I got to thinking that warmth can stimulate blood flow, and that fit a TMS model of what might be going on.
Amazingly, the next day it felt 90% better, better than it had for weeks. This is what I have called Paradoxical Intention in prior posts -- doing the exact opposite of what you're thinking you should do to respond to your pain. But I was afraid to apply it here and it still worked.
Of course I knew it could be TMS all along, but what I've found is that the subconscious and the pain dont listen to your thoughts. They actually listen more to your actions. Acting bravely and confidently that your body is fine sends an incontrovertible message to your pain.
so here's further proof to me that what feels and acts like an injury can still be TMS. and proof your mind keeps trying new ones on you even when you're a TMS veteran. You can still fall for it, and get stuck inside the dilemma
interestingly, my thumb is still sore in a similar way as before -- just twinges now and again, and some pain with pressure. perhaps there is a real injury there, but if so it was overlaid with a massive amount of TMS that capitalized on it, and which went away overnight
hope the story helps someone!
--Sarah
--Sarah Hyacinth Jacoba
"When dream and day unite" |
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