| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| scottjmurray |
Posted - 01/24/2008 : 22:15:37
Another amazing piece of work by yours truly.
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GETTING OVER IT
A lot of people get stuck in the TMS thought-loop when they try to recover from it. They try really, really hard. They push through emotional issue after emotional issue. Night and day they are thinking about rage. They seek therapy for months or years and get nowhere. They feel like giving up, completely baffled as to why Sarno’s theories don’t work for them. Maybe they start thinking they have some huge, terrible secret inside their psyche that’s so intensely repressed and dangerous that they might never recover.
All of this will get you nowhere.
After reading many, many reports on people who made full recoveries from TMS, I realized they all shared one common trait. They let go. They got back to their lives. They read Sarno’s books a few times and left it at that. Confident in the knowledge, they “miraculously” recovered. They moved on, got back to work, started playing tennis again, and left the rest of us completely baffled. I know how that feels, because I was one of those baffled people for a very long time.
Get Over It
One thing that these quick-recovery people have in common is that they have very good control over their mental frame. They fully succeeded in not allowing any more TMS nonsense to pervade their conscious awareness. If you want to recover, this is what you have to do. Get it out of your brain. Your mind is yours. It does not belong to subconscious processes. It does not belong to your ego. It belongs to you, and only you. If you want TMS to go away, you need to get control over your own brain and put it where it needs to be–your life.
Every time your brain is wandering and worrying and obsessing, let it go. Get back to doing the dishes or whatever it was you were doing. Don’t worry about whether the dishes are causing rage. Don’t worry about your emotions. Just wash the dishes.
The next time your boss is a jerk to you, and you start TMSing, let it go. Get your brain off of it. Sure, it hurts, but get back to work. Mutter about how much you hate that guy if it’s what you feel like doing. Don’t spend your time worrying about rage, your boss, your childhood and how that relates to what’s happening right now, just get back to work. Get your head out of the gutter and away from the distraction. If it’s really bothering you, sort it out when you get home in your journal. Keep your brain in your life.
The next time you’re out exercising and your back starts acting up, let it go. Don’t worry if the exercise is causing rage. Don’t worry if you’re pushing yourself too hard. Get back on the treadmill and run.
This might sound like a contradiction to some of the other articles I’ve written about taking time to deal with your emotions. It isn’t. Your emotions are important. They are the most important feedback mechanisms you have in your life. That doesn’t mean you have to spend all day thinking about them. I would suggest putting aside a little bit of your day to do some emotional processing in whatever way you prefer (EFT, EMDR, journaling, whatever, talking, screaming, etc). Then leave it at that.
The Obsession is Part of the Disease
Always remember that your obsession fuels the strategy. To get it to stop, you need to stop being obsessed. If you catch yourself being obsessed, you need learn to develop the will-power to stop. You need to stop, because you know now that this is all completely ridiculous. You need to stop because you know this is all a big charade. You know it’s a trick. You know that your worrying supports it. Go back to whatever you were doing before you started to worry.
This is what Sarno meant by “resume normal activity.” This is what separates the slow recoveries from the fast. Which do you want to be? It’s completely up to you. Remember, it’s your brain. It’s time to take responsibility for it.
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Peace
Author of tms-recovery.com
A collection of articles on emotions, lifestyle changes, and TMS theory. |
| 6 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| vikki |
Posted - 02/03/2008 : 09:52:07
I just want to say that this is awesome. It is totally consistent with my experience. When I first read Sarno's book, I had about a 20% improvement. After that, I spent weeks desperately trying to figure out what emotion I was repressing -- like I was looking for the magic, instant cure. I was still obsessed with my pain -- only, this time I was looking for an emotional cure rather than a physical one. And, not surprisingly, things got worse -- all my progress was lost. I only improved when I quit obsessing, and just started to do things again. It did hurt, but I told myself to just shut up and do it -- "get over it." That is when I saw real improvements. |
| Wavy Soul |
Posted - 01/27/2008 : 00:46:37
Re: getting over it, etc., I like this quotation from Robert Adams (he was cool)
Speak it out loud to yourself and get over ALL OF IT!
Within you is Unimaginable Beauty, Radiance
Feel the Presence within yourself.
Feel the happiness and the Joy
that you really are.
Feel it! You can feel it!
No matter how many so-called problems
you may appear to have, what is going on in your life, good or bad, forget about that.
It does not matter.
Feel the Presence.
The Presence of Pure Awareness.
Feel this in yourself. Do not think about it.
Just Feel It. When you begin to think about it, you spoil it.
Allow the mind to rave on.
Do not pay a bit of attention to the mind.
Whatever thoughts it brings you, whatever it tells you.
Feel the Bliss. You ARE the Bliss.
There is absolutely nothing that you need, that you have to become.
When you go beyond the senses, observing them, looking at them... not reacting to them,
then you find that you have always been in BLISS>
Bliss Happiness is your Very Nature.
YOU ARE THAT
Love is the answer, whatever the question |
| truenorth |
Posted - 01/26/2008 : 18:46:44
A great post, one of the best I've seen on this site. It perfectly encapsulates the basic premise for recovery-stop the distraction and the pain will stop.
Kudos. |
| scottjmurray |
Posted - 01/25/2008 : 00:40:43
quote:
Pain very quicky loses its power over you if you can learn to let go your obsessive thoughts and fears and focus your attention on what's going on in life around you rather than introspectively focusing on your symptoms etc.
Getting outside of your head is probably one of the better things we can do as human beings to enhance and enjoy our lives. Being stuck inside yourself can really be paralyzing. This of course, extends far beyond getting rid of TMS.
Author of tms-recovery.com
A collection of articles on emotions, lifestyle changes, and TMS theory. |
| austini |
Posted - 01/24/2008 : 23:01:15
Brilliant post thanks.
This reminds me so much of Mindfulness training. During simple breath meditation you train yourself to let go thoughts, feelings and fears etc by continually returning to the breath. Then during normal everyday life you use this skill to catch your thoughts and fears etc before they suck you in. Then simply label them but then let them go. It takes a lot of practice but it is very worthwhile. Pain very quicky loses its power over you if you can learn to let go your obsessive thoughts and fears and focus your attention on what's going on in life around you rather than introspectively focusing on your symptoms etc.
I've seen it mentioned on this forum before but in my mind the treatment for anxiety/panic disorders and TMS is literally the same. That is, stop focusing and obsessing on your symptoms, learn to let go when fear/pain strikes, control your thinking (eg mindfulness), reduce your anxiety levels with meditation/relaxation and most importantly have the courage to get back to living a normal life.
Cheers - Gordon
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| Wavy Soul |
Posted - 01/24/2008 : 22:56:00
Okay, I'm over it.
Love is the answer, whatever the question |
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