| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| MikeySama |
Posted - 01/06/2008 : 14:50:03
... to get to the point where you never get the symptoms anymore? Where you are in essence cured of the condition. It's done, no more pains, no more rage etc.
Is it possible to reach that point?
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Call me Mike :) |
| 16 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| armchairlinguist |
Posted - 01/14/2008 : 13:46:29
You might be able to find the books at the library, too. I bought Miller's book but got the Bradshaw and Whitfield from our library. On edit, though, I remember you're in the Netherlands, so they might not be as common there. Still, worth a check, perhaps.
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It's not 100% belief that's required, but 100% commitment. |
| MikeySama |
Posted - 01/14/2008 : 13:26:55
Thanks for all your input, it's weird all this stuff. Had pain the entire day, right now nothing. Did i do anything special, not really. Same old tricks. It'll probably come back though >_>
I should get a few commitments out of the way, it's a lot and it's very stressful. The whole school thing i don't even want to do anymore, i want to be done with it so badly and just get a nice job. I try to fit in some of my hobbies and some "me" time as often as i can. But during those times i seem to have the symptoms more often, then when i'm just working my ass off.
I will try to get one of the books you mentioned at the end of this month when i get paid. Also about the meditation thing, i used to do it quite often. I dunno why i quit doing it.
Edit: I don't know if this could mean anything. I had an internship period for about 5 months, with hardly any school obligations. For the most part i was painfree, with only 1 real flair-up. It had to do with me feeling inferior to the guy i worked with. He knows so much about development. In any case that internship period is over now and school is starting, and i've gotten worse again. Maybe it really has to do with school, but what am i going to do about that. I can't very well drop it, only 1,5 year left before i'm done.
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Call me Mike :) |
| armchairlinguist |
Posted - 01/14/2008 : 12:54:21
I wondered if that might be the case. It's so common, and tragic, that insurance doesn't cover what we may really need to get better. I am paying out-of-pocket for mine and if not for some money my family put aside for me I would really be struggling. You might try some kind of clinic or group therapy if you can find it, but that can be hard to find.
Hm. Curiosity's thought of Jon Kabat-Zinn seems like it might be a good one. I haven't done his thing, but Full Catastrophe Living is a great book. My old sig on the board was also from his book, Wherever You Go, There You Are.
You do have a lot of commitments, but commitment to your health is essential. Maybe it needs to take priority over the other things you're doing, or you can see what creative ways you might be able to fit things in. Maybe it will at least recharge your thinking to try to take a different tack. I think going through the same old, same old Sarno techniques can get really old after a while; maybe this will be something fresher.
I did some work before I was in therapy using Alice Miller and John Bradshaw's books, which was helpful. Have you read those? The Drama of the Gifted Child and Healing the Shame That Binds You. I also liked Charles Whitfield's Healing the Child Within. Books are cheaper than therapists, but you do run some risk of getting overwhelmed by the emotions that can come up. Still, I was able to get through that, so as long as you're forewarned that that can happen, it may work for you.
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It's not 100% belief that's required, but 100% commitment. |
| MikeySama |
Posted - 01/14/2008 : 02:16:20
I don't know what that is really. I've had weird problems with some things staying stuck in my mind before. Usually bad things that happened, it would stay stuck in my mind 24/7. It takes months and months before it goes away. Like a song playing in your head over and over.
Now it's TMS that's on my mind 24/7...
And the hate is still there, but i figured it's not hate about TMS itself. It's the hate i feel towards myself for not being able to break out of this cycle you mentioned.
I know i need a therapist. Pretty certain i've needed one for a long time. I don't want to go...having to rehash everything once again. Besides i don't know what to look for in a therapist, the whole idea of TMS is like a fairytale here. In that regard i have talked to a doctor about it, and that i wanted to stop physical treatments ( physical therapy, and a chiropractor ). Who told me basically that i shouldn't believe such rubbish. Mind you this was years ago, when i first found out about TMS. And a few months later at a checkup i surprised him a lot by actually being pain free.
Anyway, therapy... It's another obligation, where am i going to find the time for it. I spend nearly 50 hours on school on a weekly basis, have a job for 10 hours a week, and i'm way overweight so i need to find time to start working out again.
I shouldn't put timestamps on my health, but how many responsibilities can a guy take.
Edit: I took a look at my health insurance, it doesn't cover therapy of any kind. Then i looked at the prices of 1 session... i can't afford it. Not while i'm in school, and the job i have is to afford school to begin with...
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Call me Mike :) |
| Curiosity18 |
Posted - 01/13/2008 : 21:53:58
Sorry- wrong spelling. It's Jon Kabat-Zinn!
Curiosity |
| Curiosity18 |
Posted - 01/13/2008 : 21:45:48
Mike-
Have you tried any kind of relaxation/meditation strategies? Jon Cabot-Zinn has a really good CD on mindfulness meditation that might be helpful for you while you're working on your issues. His program involves noticing the symptoms as sensations, without judgment and focusing on staying present. He has a pretty good track record with helping people "manage" pain. Again, not to replace Sarno's program, but to assist while you're going through the process. I empathize with your frustration. Many of us have been there! If you do decide to see a therapist make sure that they are insight-oriented.
Take care,
Curiosity
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| armchairlinguist |
Posted - 01/13/2008 : 17:55:39
You mentioned pretty much everything except what is recommended when relapses are persistent and unresponsive: see a therapist. It sounds like you need help figuring out what's going on for you because it's not obvious. There's no shame in that. Lots of us need help with it.
I think the last time you came by to post we also talked about how your feelings about pain and TMS might be perpetuating the pain, since you were so strongly involved with hating it. I don't know if that's still the case, but it can be a tough cycle to get out of. You're still saying that the pain is on your mind all the time, so it's not clear to me you've gotten past that, but not knowing you, I can't really say.
It is possible to get better. See what you can do about a therapist. With all you've done, I don't know that this board is going to help you much more as far as tips and tricks.
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It's not 100% belief that's required, but 100% commitment. |
| MikeySama |
Posted - 01/13/2008 : 16:59:11
Well... I"ve done everything i possibly can to deal with TMS. I really don't know what else to do.
I had goodist and perfectionist traits, but both have been pounded into the ground so to say. I don't care about things being absolutely perfect anymore, as long as i'm happy with the end result that's enough. And my standards on what is good have really been taken down a notch.
Goodist nature, well i think more about myself now and less about others. Not that i don't care about others, i just try to think of myself more often now.
I've journalled from A to Z, and i still do it on occasion to figure out current stresses in life.
I've done all kinds of tactics to get better, like internal dialogue, shouting at my mind, getting angry, trying to understand, talking to somoene about it etc etc
I've even done periods of not doing a damn thing about it, just going on about my life. And whenever i felt symptoms coming on. I would just shrug it off.
Nothing seems to be fracking enough. I've had it, i had a good run with it for 2 years where i was mostly fine with minor flair-ups. And now nearly a year already of constant flair-ups. It just doesn't go away anymore.
It also doesn't help that the pain is on my mind 24/7 again. Not that i fear it or anything, i do whatever the hell i want anyway. But it just won't leave me alone anymore =_=
I just don't understand it anymore. I don't even feel like trying anymore, my mind has won. I'll take the damn pain, hurt me more for all i care =_=
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Call me Mike :) |
| Scottydog |
Posted - 01/09/2008 : 07:11:13
Well, YOU may be coming to the point where you understand yourself and know exactly how to deal with your problems and weaknesses but, unfortunately, 99% of the rest of the human race aren't. They will still be around you - being unreasonably angry over trivia, loading their worries and insecurities onto you as they search for sympathy, being too weak willed to solve simple problems etc - so, pessimistically, unless you live on a desert island, I don't think you will be totally cured. (I may be a teensy bit biased here as have just spent 3 weeks with visiting relatives) |
| Wavy Soul |
Posted - 01/08/2008 : 23:37:58
quote:
It's the product of having a neocortex slapped on top of a lizard brain. It's part of being human. Maybe the Buddha killed all of his rage, and we can all hope to be as blessed as that dude, but for now just be human.
Dunno about the Buddha, but a lot of people who pose as Buddhas are clearly sitting on piles of rage, suppressing the lizard with all their might. They don't necessarily get TMS, but there is always some manifestation of this imbalance, like food/sex/work/compulsive thinking addiction, using other people, etc.
As has been said above, the blessing of TMS is that it can force us to become more integrated, because the other choice is pain. I do feel that it has ultimately been a blessing, but I can't say I like it.
xx
Love is the answer, whatever the question |
| armchairlinguist |
Posted - 01/08/2008 : 10:05:31
scott, I completely agree. I've written a bit elsewhere about how I view TMS, if not exactly as a blessing in disguise, at least as a major growing experience for me, and one I can't really imagine my life without.
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It's not 100% belief that's required, but 100% commitment. |
| scottjmurray |
Posted - 01/08/2008 : 01:57:04
quote:
We all generate inner rage constantly. I think even in the most self-aware person, we generate a moderate amount because life just doesn't always work the way we want it to (everyday life pressures, in Sarno parlance). It's possible to change our lives and psychology so that we generate less ...
If there's one thing that I've learned from all of this, it's "don't drive yourself crazy." I think that all the pain I've been through the past 3 years ended up saving my life from a trash-heap of internal conflict and unnecessary stress. I was headed in a bad direction when I first came down with my *major* TMS episode. Stressing all the time about things that didn't matter. Ugh, it was terrible. Doing the emotional work made my life a whole lot better.
As far as being totally TMS free? I wouldn't worry too much about that. No one's perfect. Even Sarno himself still has random episodes of psychosomatic symptoms, which he's written about in his books. You should definitely be able to get to the point where it won't scare you, intimidate you, or worry you. If something aches or feels weird every now and then, you'll be able to shake it off.
But no, the rage never dies. It's a fundamental aspect of the human psyche. It's the product of having a neocortex slapped on top of a lizard brain. It's part of being human. Maybe the Buddha killed all of his rage, and we can all hope to be as blessed as that dude, but for now just be human.
Author of tms-recovery.com
A collection of articles on emotions, lifestyle changes, and TMS theory. |
| armchairlinguist |
Posted - 01/07/2008 : 20:51:34
It's quite different to ask if you can be done with the pain versus if you can be done with the rage. Pain yes, rage no. And really, if you're still wondering that, Sarno is your best resource. He's very clear on the difference and on the outcome for each.
We all generate inner rage constantly. I think even in the most self-aware person, we generate a moderate amount because life just doesn't always work the way we want it to (everyday life pressures, in Sarno parlance). It's possible to change our lives and psychology so that we generate less (we can resolve our childhood trauma through deep psychological work, and learn to work with and respect ourselves in the present), but it's pretty hard.
Thus, Sarno's simple solution is that we become aware of the rage and acknowledge it as normal (so it becomes less scary) and we determine not to allow that rage to be expressed through pain. When you totally succeed with this (which is possible, though a more pratical main goal is to reach a point where any symptoms are minor, occasional, and a cause for a chuckle rather than fear) then you won't get symptoms anymore. You may have to express the rage some other way though -- hopefully a more healthy one!
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It's not 100% belief that's required, but 100% commitment. |
| mizlorinj |
Posted - 01/07/2008 : 07:30:52
YES, Mike, you can heal the physical condition.
One thing I must to do remain pain free is process emotions as they arise. This happened to me yesterday. A memory surfaced during a conversation and I instantly got heartburn! I addressed with the person the memory that I had repressed when the situation happened YEARS AGO, and the heartburn went away. (I realize you cannot always address a hurt directly with the person in which case I write them a "feelings letter" which I do not mail)
But the incapacitating TMS pain I had a year ago is gone. Completely.
I suggest reading some of the success stories on this forum.
-Lori |
| painintheneck |
Posted - 01/06/2008 : 19:07:04
In Sarno's books the 'cure" most often was just having your conscious aware of the process of the deception and distraction. |
| electraglideman |
Posted - 01/06/2008 : 17:13:41
Even though you don't feel it the rage never leaves your unconscious but you need to be aware of it. |
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