| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| basil |
Posted - 12/07/2007 : 17:15:52
Hello all
Back in April I got RSI symptoms in my left arm then both and finally hands, shoulder. This was just before my graduation.
I found out about TMS in June and have tried that mentality since but have pretty much got nowhere. Had to go on a mild anti depressant to get me out and about again.
Tomorrow I move in with my girlfriend so I have no choice to go back to work and I am pretty fed up seen as I cant do anything to do with my degree as I am not emotionally or physically prepared.
My question is should I be going back to the Doc and demanding more investigations as I haven't had any improvements. My Doc did put me through for therapy which I now start next week for cognitive behavior therapy. But my therapist believes in the whole RSI crap.
I have tried all kind of methods of thinking from tips I have read on here and I can even play computer games for up to 12 hours with not an increase or decrease in the severity of the symptoms. Although my neck is now very painful to move about. I basically feel like a big stiff object.
Sorry for all the whining but I am just so confused and ultimately fed up with this. I just feel when I finally managed to get through University and start my life I just get a slap in the face.
So should I be going back to the Doc's to get more tests and deeper examinations?
Thanks in advance
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| 9 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| basil |
Posted - 12/22/2007 : 06:04:03
Thanks Hilary :) |
| HilaryN |
Posted - 12/20/2007 : 16:32:17
Good luck with the interview, Basil!
Hilary N |
| armchairlinguist |
Posted - 12/20/2007 : 11:37:13
quote:
Although she believes in the whole egonomics and RSI subjects she does acknowledge health anxiety and how the mind can play a big part in alot of these illnesses.
Hi basil,
Sounds like you're doing well. I would advise that if your therapist pushes any of the ergonomics stuff with you that you ignore it. It sounds like she is focusing more on your emotional concerns which is great. The ergonomics stuff is so much nonsense, so don't let the fact that she believes it distract you from TMS. Your approach to get back out doing things and sort stuff out is just what Sarno recommends, so good for you.
--
It's not 100% belief that's required, but 100% commitment. |
| basil |
Posted - 12/20/2007 : 10:34:48
Hi thanks for replies first of all.
Campbell, reading your reply and also your other thread on the so 'called' RSI sounds strangely similar. The pressures we put on ourselves to perform to our best and excel in what we choose to do. I am now beginning to see this as the main cause of my 'breakdown' and the development of my RSI.
I originally didn't do to well at school and failed my first attempt at college. This was very hard for me and I think this where my perfectionist characteristics come from. Second time round in education saw me push myself, especially in university. I couldn't bare the thought of failing or not been as good as someone else at what I do.
'I think in a way the RSI was my body's way of getting me out of that situation. I think it has taken a while to go because it took me a while to accept that I had been pushing myself too hard for far too long.'
Strange you say this becuase my therapist has come to the conclusion that this is what might had happened. I was so worried about not getting into my chosen career and industry that applied too much pressure on myself along side all the other worrying I do.
Since I made this thread I have made some suprising progress. In the last 2 weeks I have only exprienced one day of pain I think I am now beginning to unravel the complicated situation I have got myself into. I can see myself letting the fear go. I have moved out of my mum's house and into a flat with my girlfriend and sorted out alot of little problems that have been hanging over my head. I have even got a second interview for rather well paid position as a graphic designer. I could now say I have removed myself from alot of pressures and made some important decisions.
I tried the journalling and stuff but I think it became a kind of an addiction and vicous cycle of thinking about the whole situation. I also cut down my use of this site as it was like a temporary relief but not a true fix, same as kind of asking someone for constant reassurance.
I hope you continue to make progress Campbell.
Hi painintheneck
Yes my therapist is being very helpful but she wants to concerntrate more on how these attacks of pain begin and continue. Although she believes in the whole egonomics and RSI subjects she does acknowledge health anxiety and how the mind can play a big part in alot of these illnesses.
We are mainly working on vicous circles that my mind produces and also my anxiety like you mentioned. Doing this work I am starting to realise that this has been going on for years and not only when I began to to get these symptoms.
For now I have decided that TMS and health anxiety is the way to go. After doing some therapy last week and adding up the symptoms and times none of it makes sense in a physical term. Pain when I am travelling to another city (my mums) but not when I sit working on a advertisement for 5 hours.
Overall I am amazed how I have functioned for the last 10 years after the expriences in my past and the pressures I put on myself. When I get through this I will probably look back and be grateful before I had a real breakdown!
Things that have worked for me so far:
1. Getting back on the pc and doing something useful!
2. Getting back out and socialising
3. Making postive steps in my life
4. Keeping busy
5. Sorting out all little things that are unconciously stressing me
5. Staying away from most of the crap on the internet
Ok well I am going to get ready for my second interview and report back afterwards. Hopefully I can continue to break my vicious cycles of thought and keep recovering.
Happy Christmas to everyone and heop you all continue to be physically and mentally healthy!
Basil
(sorry for spelling mistakes, no spell checker on this system :D)
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| painintheneck |
Posted - 12/19/2007 : 16:43:00
Basil,
It took me about 10 years of freaking out over my pain, stiffness, tingling, heart palpitations, numbness that comes and goes in the left arm, dizziness, headaches, panic attacks to stop totally focusing on the physical and trying everything I could to find what physical thing was causeing all this stuff.
I have an anxiety issue that came on the very day the neck issues began. Fear of medical things goes hand in hand with this, it isn't something seperate, it's a part of it. Don't think of it as a process by it's self, think of it as a piece of this puzzle you are putting together.
I still get moments that panic sets in when i have disturbing symptoms and i have to do some serious self talk and remind myself that I am here after going through this crap for so long the liklihood is that it will pass in a few moments if I don't get too worked up over it.
If you feel you will be better equipped to start on a new path then by all means please do get the tests done. It is the only thing i find often that we can be sure one way or another what is really going on. My biggest issue was that after reading my MRI report I was terrified. Reality is that the MRI report isn't really as aweful or "abnormal" as it sounds. So keep in mind that it isn't unusual to find some things that aren't picture perfect "normal".
Is your therapist getting into the issues you mentioned were stressful when this all began? You might want to look into that time and even now and see what all is going on and what you can improve there. You can always do some extra therapy sessions to have time to explore things, maybe mention it if you haven't. I'm currently in therapy for my anxiety issues but we also cover other issues because I have had some serious trauma in my life I can't yet get past. |
| campbell28 |
Posted - 12/19/2007 : 13:56:28
just wondering if you have tried digging really deep into the emotional stuff. I know you say you have tried ' thinking mental' - does that include stuff like journaling, writing proper big lists of all your stresses, and really trying to dig up what could be affecting you emotionally?
I have had 'RSi' (tms) for 3 / 4 years and been off work for a year and a half - I found out about TMS in August but am only really starting to get better now. I think this is because I had a kind of breakdown as well, due to the stress of my job and the fact I was pushing myself to do a career I didn't really want, just because I felt I 'ought' to.
I think in a way the RSI was my body's way of getting me out of that situation. I think it has taken a while to go because it took me a while to accept that I had been pushing myself too hard for far too long. I had initial success with the TMS work, then, when I started thinking ' great, I can go back to work now' it all flared up again.
This was because, subconsciously, I really didn't want to go back to work - or not to my previous job anyway. I just couldn't take the pressure. Being a perfectionist high-achiever, its taken me a while to realise this but now I am OK with the fact that, at least for a while, I only want to do a low-stress, low-pressure, undemanding job.
Your pain may be taking a while to subside because you haven't really got to the root of what's causing it. It sounds like you were also under a lot of pressure when you started developing the TMS - are you still under that pressure?
ONe of the things that really made me think was on Rachel Podolsky's website - she asks the question: how would you feel if all your symptoms just vanished, right now?
I thought about it and realised I would be terrified. I would be terrified because I would have to face the fact that I had no idea what to do next with my life: that I would have to go back to work and put myself under pressure again. That's when I started t realise what was really behind all the symptoms.
Have a look at rachel's website if you haven't already - its v helpful.
http://podolsky.everybody.org/rsi/
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| koukla |
Posted - 12/09/2007 : 14:17:11
I began having problems 2 months into my first real "office job" right out of college. I put a lot of pressure on myself and also got engaged around the same time. I was in lot of stress. It got worse after I got married which makes perfect sense to me now, but at the time I was convinced it was some sort of tendon disorder.
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| basil |
Posted - 12/09/2007 : 10:54:16
Well I have moved now and my girlfriend has suggested a more active approach to recovering in the sense of getting out everyday and keeping my mind busy with other problems than my my arms. Although she doesn't 100% believe the TMS theory she does believe I am worrying too much and making the situation worse.
My therapist has diagnosed me with health anxiety which is contributing to whatever is wrong with me. I got a couple more months of this treament so I will see how this goes.
Personally somewhere in my mind I am still convinced there is something physically wrong with me as I have not been able to remove the pains by shouting, thinking mental or pushing through the pain. I played 12 hours on a computer game one time with no change in the level of aching (I had been waiting for this game a long time, I dont do this everyday!)
I do believe now I had a kind of'breakdown' with the amount of stress I was experiencing when this all began.
1. Dissertation at Universisty
2. Relationship problems
3. Finding somewhere to live and getting a full time job.
4. Many more usual stress's I put on my self.
So the way I see it:
Sitting at the PC stressing about my work >> Naturally beginning to ache from the stress >> Reading about RSI >> My obcessive personality and worrying about physical symptoms >> developing a chronic condition and thinking I am doomed for life.
As for the medical route I have never gone the physical as my GP reffered me straight for therapy as she was confused that I had no mobility problems or loss of strength but instead just a constant diffuse ache.
Thanks for advice Koukla and I guess you are having related problems in this area. Hope your getting there!
People are probably annoyed about me still been on a physical page but I am finding this very hard to understand and apply to this situation I am in. Hopefully one day I will get there.
Maybe I need 100% proof that this is not physical like you said Koula before I can truely begin to heal mentally or physically.
Thanks
basil
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| koukla |
Posted - 12/08/2007 : 08:08:38
Basil,
I honestly don't think the orthopedic doctors know what they are talking about. I have gone to quite a few and they will do you a disservice if anything. The fact that you can play computer games to 12 hours without more pain means that the problem isn't in your arms but in your mind. It makes absolutely no sense that you would get pain from other things but not computer games.
If you are not totally convinced of TMS then it probably won't do you any good. It might be beneficial to try the medical route again just to prove it to yourself that you don't have a medical problem. This is what I did and I finally came to the realization that it was TMS and I went for it full throttle. Do not see an orthopedist--see a physiatrist and get a referral for a good PT. A PT knows way more about healing an injury than a doctor does. Do all the stretches and exercises religiously and if you do not see a consistent improvement after 1 month then the problem is not in your body. This is the route I took and it was mainly based on the fact that my PT (who had a lot of experience) was confused as to why I wasn't improving.
I did a lot of reading on my own and I was getting excellent care and following all the instructions. It turned out that the problem was TMS and I should have followed my gut to begin with. I just wasn't ready for it and I needed to prove it to myself that it wasn't medical in nature. This is maybe what you need too. Your body is designed to heal--especially if you are still in your 20's and getting proper nutrition. Whatever you do, do not get surgery, as that can cause permanent damage.
Good luck,
Carolyn |
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