| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| curingCFS |
Posted - 12/02/2007 : 17:58:57
20 years I had chronic fatigue syndrome, unable to work. I've been working hard at TMS for about a month.
I have a pedometer and I've been able to get myself to 10k steps a day for 3 days now. Normal was around 5-6k. Now to do this I've taken an aerobic tape for 25 minutes or walking on the sidewalk or beach. I'm in my 40's and I wasn't able to do this before with the cfs=tms. I am having success with the Sarno method yet, I don't know what is normal. What I can do--what I should push myself to do. I tried to jog a little, but I felt like I was hitting the pavement like a ton of bricks-- a lot has changed in 20 years. So how far can I take it? Resume all normal activity--well that was 20 years ago and I was in my 20's. What steps per day goals should I shoot for? I'm wanting to not let any fear stop me, yet there is being really out of shape, and still not completely symptom free. But much better.
Also this week I am going to a womans charity that will at no cost give me all sorts of tests for career counseling, plus counseling and help with resumes etc. I don't at this point feel ready/capable of full time work, but am on my way I believe and want to use job/career info to sort of "pull" myself forward. To be able to earn income would be the most meaningful happy result of Sarno method. Even more so then cessation of symptoms. I really want to work.
Anyone who can advise me I'd appreciate it.
Linda |
| 12 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Wavy Soul |
Posted - 12/07/2007 : 18:59:33
The question asked in this thread is one of my exact questions. The way I have dealt with it has been through.... caffeine!
The funny thing is that in 30 years of fatigue I NEVER used caffeine because every single stupid list of recommendations, by alternate and straight docs, would tell me it was poison. Then my naturopath said, No, you probably need it because your mom drank so much tea and coffee when you were in the womb, your body got bonded to it. He recommended green tea caps, which he said would be slow release rather than the negative hit to the nervous system that comes from drinking caffeinated beverages that go straight into the blood through the mouth.
I found this absolutely life-saving. It gave me enough energy to drag my ass to my exercise in the morning. Once I am half way through my swim or yoga class, I start to feel a circulation of energy in my body that NOTHING else gives me. Then the exercise seems to give me the energy to keep going for much of the day. I get tired in the afternoons and evenings, but this change has actually allowed me to have a life.
I consider the caffeine, for me, to be like taking painkillers when you are dealing with TMS pain. When I went through dramatic tooth pain of 17 new teeth last year, I couldn't do any of the steps without some tylenol. But once it was a bit subdued I could go into the real feelings, change the thoughts, etc.
Same with the fatigue: There is a breakthrough point I couldn't get through without it. But once I get through it, I have the energy, emotional and mental, to completely go for it and be energetic. My life has changed radically with this, and it feels very integrated with my TMS work. It's my way of "just doing it."
Of course, if you are already using caffeine it won't work for you probably.
I feel a bit leery of telling this here, because I don't want anyone telling me this is not TMS-ly correct ;-) like I give a s***
love to all
Love is the answer, whatever the question |
| MAbbott |
Posted - 12/07/2007 : 13:02:06
Penny,
I have to thank you for the comment about ridding yourself of certain friends. I have felt SO guilty for "slowly divorcing" a handful of people -- nice people, just not "my" people. A couple of them don't want to give me up and that has made it much harder. But you have given me the courage to just let them go -- THANKS!
Mabbott |
| Penny |
Posted - 12/04/2007 : 16:30:47
quote:
Originally posted by curingCFS
Do we all think too much or is it just me?
Yes, well at least that's true for me. Thinking, obsessing, over analyzing. That's why I try to make a point to STOP thinking. (Why I love Eckhart Tolle's ideas, b/c he helps to calm my thoughts.)
I consider myself a recovering perfectionist. For some folks it's alcohol, some it's binge eating, others it might be sex addiction ... for me, it was --I emphasize was-- never feeling that anything I did was good enough. I am a writer, so this became paralyzing. I'd be on deadline, undergoing the 5th rewrite of something, that was probably really good at draft #1! Posting here has been a great retraining for me, b/c I don't allow myself to go in and edit my typos--OR my feelings. I have to live with them hanging out there. Glaring, ugly exposed, and sometimes misinterpreted. Perfectly imperfect. Some times I'll edit for content, but NEVER for typos or my feelings. Talk about thinking about something too much!
LOL!  |
| curingCFS |
Posted - 12/04/2007 : 06:32:34
koukla yes, that is it exactly, I have the book from the library and yes the idea of PUSHING MYSELF and fear of relapse.
It is still a meek, groveling, thank you for the increased energy--I'll be good and not abuse it-- sort of barganing with the devil. And when I think of it as the devil I have more clarity. I have increased my functioning a lot--but feeling it is given to me (and can be taken away if I don't this or that) instead of feeling I HAVE TAKEN THIS, I DEMAND THIS of myself.
Penny, really helpful post, yes the idea of resting/withdrawing and recovering is what I did, and felt better and yes the devil wins then. To get over my fear I really do need to push.
What is the frigging point in driving myself exercise wise? Is that what I REALLY want after decades of disability? There are more things I want than that! And maybe one exercise tape a day and not make a bid deal out of it, like brushing/flossing habit. Just something I do.
armchairlinguist yes, what do I WANT to do, and do it. Not make a huge deal of it, just make sure I do what I want no matter what. Thanks mamboulet too.
I like thinking of it as the devil. I don't really buy that it is protecting me of dangerous repressed emotions. I take it more of the ego wanting to cut off/ hide a huge part of the egoic self so that awareness doesn't see the very insane nature/ground of ego. Hows that for a spiritual take on it. LOL!
Do we all think too much or is it just me?
Linda
ps, I really like the people here! I wish this stuff would catch on so that there would be support groups everywhere to meet and work on it! |
| Penny |
Posted - 12/03/2007 : 20:57:33
quote:
Originally posted by curingCFS
Fatigue is bit of a pickle. How to push through when there is ache AND percieved lack of energy?
Hi Linda, What would happen if thru the exhaustion you did what your conscious wanted to anyway regardless of your energy level?! What wold happen if you pretended like you had the energy to do what you wanted, and then just went out and did it, ignoring your energy level, the same way we need to ignore the pain?
For me, when I get zapped with the fog (today it happened), I continue on. (I used to bail and go to bed, retract from my life.) Now, instead I take note about the situation I was in right before the exhaustion hits. (It was therapy today for me). Then I keep on going and doing. Funny enough, it goes. It passes. It's like it gives up trying to get my attention, just like my pain manifestations most often do.
Sometimes, if the fog didn't go it would evolve to me sobbing my heart out. I hated that, but the feeling didn't last. It passed like some type of emotional contraction.
You need to recondition your brain. Take your life back. Don't let any symptoms or pain or fatigue control you anymore. Shake it up. Change your routine. If you feel like curling into a little ball, challenge yourself. Jump up and down to loud music. Scream at the fatigue, don't kowtow to it. Do something, anything, but don't do what your subconscious has been dictating to you.
This may sound crazy. TMS IS CRAZIER!!! You have already made some drastic changes, so stay on a roll. I can tell by your posts and all the things you are doing that you are committed to getting better, so hang in there and make a fuss for yourself. You are taking some great steps. Keep pushing!
Penny |
| armchairlinguist |
Posted - 12/03/2007 : 20:10:12
Normal activity is what YOU want to do. If you can do what you want to do, and at the end of the day you feel tired in a pleasant way, you're set. No objective outside standard is needed.
--
It's not 100% belief that's required, but 100% commitment. |
| mamaboulet |
Posted - 12/03/2007 : 10:15:34
Working toward walking 30 minutes a day, 3-4 times a week, is a simple healthy goal. If you want to hedge your bets with osteoporosis as you approach your fifties, add in a couple of light weight workouts each week after the 3-4 days of walking has become a habit. You can do a lot with a pair of 2 pound weights.
Why in the world would you want to take up jogging? It's a rather high impact form of exercise. I used to be an obsessive runner. Now I walk. Walking is healthy, low impact, works on both muscle tone and aerobic conditioning, reduces stress, increases energy, and can be done anywhere, for free. |
| koukla |
Posted - 12/03/2007 : 10:10:31
Linda, did you read the Pain Free for Life book by Scott Brady? I was rereading it this morning where he was talking about the crutches people use that hinder their progress. Interestingly, I think the example he used was someone with fibro who had a lot of fatigue and who was scared of pushing herself. It sounds similar to your situation.
If you are giving yourself excellent nutrition, which I'm sure you are, there is no reason why you shouldn't have enough energy to do what you need to do. I like using little visualizations to help me out and I'm a scientific minded person so if I had your problem, I would be picturing my cells and how they are making the proper amount of ATP. Just as someone with TMS back pain doesn't have anything structurally wrong with their spine causing them pain, there is nothing structurally wrong with you on the cellular level. Just a thought. Hope you feel encouraged.
Carolyn |
| curingCFS |
Posted - 12/03/2007 : 09:39:27
Thank you all for the advice.
I hit the couch today pretty exhausted.
Pain I can understand in that there is nothing structually wrong, just keep using the back or arm or what have you.
Fatigue is bit of a pickle. How to push through when there is ache AND percieved lack of energy? I'd guess normal people would load up on coffee for the energy. Me and coffee do not get along though.
When am I babying myself and using fear of worse symptoms vs. I'm taking recovery slowly but surely--or am I fooling myself?
I guess I am using the steps and workouts to get a jump on healing and energy production--like I want to be out running and sweating like a racehorse for when I've got my tms fatigue and pain under control. I want to get out in the world and have at it in every way!
Thanks,
Linda |
| Penny |
Posted - 12/02/2007 : 21:29:56
To me normal activity means doing what my conscious brain (ME)chooses to do, not necessarily what is required of me. It means reconciling what is required of me with what I actually want to do. It also means defining "health" on my own terms, instead of societally held ideals.
When I first started my recovery I made a list of all the people in my life, those I loved, those who needed something from me. I decided some of my "friends" were actually part of my problem. Slowly I divorced them. They probably think I am horrible dreadful awful person, but removing them from my must call list has given me more time for people who actually care for me and my well being.
I've still got a long way to go, but I'm much more honest with myself than I was a year ago, and the people in my life are on my side.
>|< Penny
"Feeling will get you closer to the truth of who you are than thinking."
~ Eckhart Tolle
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| golden_girl |
Posted - 12/02/2007 : 19:24:58
This is just a random thought and it's not supposed to be in any way offensive  ! But maybe you could find a fitness program designed for very overweight people - like, I guess they would start off slow as they probably haven't done much exercise for a while, but then it would build up after a while?
"F.E.A.R.
Forgive Everyone And Remember
For Everything A Reason"
Ian Brown |
| koukla |
Posted - 12/02/2007 : 19:04:56
Instead of trying to reach some sort of quota of steps per day, why not try to measure your activity in terms of things that you accomplish? I don't know what the normal amount of steps are but, but I'm sure after 20 years of being inactive even without CFS, anyone would get easily tired. I always feel my best when I am doing something and my mind is on something I need to pay attention to instead of something more passive. Have you tried doing manual things around the house, like vacuuming, cooking, scrubbing floors, etc? That might make you feel like you are accomplishing something and you would build up muscle tone as well.
Carolyn |
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