| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| mcone |
Posted - 11/18/2007 : 14:45:14
Yet another Thinking Physical post. I have a crafty PS in defense of such posts at the end.
What do I do with symptoms that seem to be defying the rules of TMS? Certain symptoms undermine my confidence in continuing to use my body fearlessly - and leave me feeling weak and tentative.
Specifically, I frequently have bouts (for a few days at a time) of what I think is an actual tendinitis *inflammation* in my left triceps area (and slightly on my right as well). While I believe these to have a TMS root cause (see below: "TOS" TMS) the symptom pattern and character seems to defy "mild, harmless, oxygen deprivation:"
1. The nature of the pain is continuous, harsh burning.
2. Symptoms come on within a day or two of increased activity. [Most recently, I flew back to MN 11 days ago to (finally) begin closing out my apartment (after being away from MN for 9 months). I was resuming driving again, moving boxes, using my kitchen for cooking, etc.]
3. They seem to respond to *local* icing and anti-inflmmatories; and
4. They diminish after a couple days rest.
[Note. The left triceps pain pattern first started about a year ago - within a week or two of relying heavily on my left arm after the emergence of my (main) right wrist symptoms. It is hard to reconcile with TMS because it appeared without any type of conditioning or expectation that I'm aware of - and with no symmetry to my (primary) right wrist symptom. I simply jumped out at me when I suddenly realized it was burning severely - and it is not an area that I had ever associated with sports activities or computer use (like my wrist).]
[Second Note. The left triceps symptoms seems to aggravate some kind of "cubital tunnel syndrome" (parasthesia, numbness, tingling in forearm and ulnar fingers - symptoms that are similar to, but a bit different from those on my right wrist]
"TOS" TMS
I am compelled to consider a "thoracic outlet syndrome" mechanism (a type of TMS?) for several reasons:
1. I do frequently have chest pain (mostly on the left - diagnosed years ago as anxiety). I often experience tightness, stiffness and soreness in the chest/brachial plexus area.
2. Symptoms seems to respond somewhat to mentally-focused relaxation of the chest/brachial plexus area.
3. Symptoms seem somewhat responsive to massage (of the chest/brachial plexus area) as well.
[Note: These observations would seem consistent with *Nate McNamara's* application of Sarno's approach (He experienced a severe "RSI," while a (highly specialized) MRI revealed blood flow constrictions in the thoracic outlet, and he eventually recovered by applying mindbody. He has suggested that the typical mechanism involved in (TMS) "RSI" is the autonomic nervous system constricting blood flow in the thoracic outlet.] See here: http://conquerrsi.com/faq.html
I'm not disregarding that TMS dynamics are operating here. To the contrary, psychological phenomenon precipitated ALL my arm symptoms (i.e., the onset of symptoms was clearly associated with extreme stress and anxiety), my own (right) wrist MRI fails to demonstrate any serious structural issues, and the modest activity levels of my left arm, by themselves, wouldn't seem to be a good explanation for symptoms. And of course,there are HUGE emotional components to my experience of being back in MN as well.
Yet, I keep asking if TMS has gone malignant on me. It is hard for me to fully reconcile these symptoms with "harmless" TMS and getting past the fear of "injuring/re-injuring" these tendons is a HUGE challenge. What if using arms/tendons under conditions of (TMS) blood flow restriction is like running a car engine without oil? Will I injure myself by challenging the pain? Is this like an acute attack that Dr. Sarno describes? OR what if I'm just experiencing the effects of deconditioning as a result of disuse (as suggested in another topic) - Could this now be a corresponding physiological overuse tendinitis? What about the "frightening" idea that my body's healing capacity has simply slowed down dramatically due to stress (admittedly, not a TMS idea). Very hard to stop thinking physical...I think my TMS defenses are really strong!
PS
In Defense of Posts Like This...The redeeming value of these posts, I would submit, is for future TMS'er - newcomers who are angst-ridden with the same types of doubts, fears and inhibitions that I'm experiencing, who will read this post together with (hopefullly) future posts of recovery. Yes, it's true that I need to keep hearing that I should stop thinking physical. Yet, the most helpful posts to me, are early posts of those with similar struggles who eventually recovered. Redsandro comes to mind as someone who, early on, raised compelling questions about the inner workings of TMS.
Reading the archives suggests that some of these questions can be addressed, but some cannot be answered to a high degree of satisfaction (a subjective judgment). Yet this isn't really the point. What inspires me is the fact that one can have compelling questions and still succeed at TMS. Redsandro even acknowledged, in his Successtory post, that at some level, there is something "vague" and "scary" about TMS and that he still doesn't know how to (fully) convince others and himself. (I think I'm representing this properly.) |
| 4 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| mcone |
Posted - 11/19/2007 : 13:59:08
I have to agree with you that it may be best for me to stop trying to "outlogic" the physical thinking. My TMS disposition could amount to: Restating my basic TMS evidence from time to time, acknowledging that there isn't definitive evidence to prove the physical models (much of it remains equivocal), and trusting that the process has been demonstrated to work for people with symptoms very much like mine.
Another individual who recovered from "RSI" TMS, has similarly, advised me to get angry at the fear/doubt. |
| armchairlinguist |
Posted - 11/19/2007 : 08:59:00
Sorry if I sounded harsh -- I know you are working out your thoughts and trying to assume some power over them. If that route works for you, that's good.
Intrusive thoughts are a tough one, and it's important to recognize them as essentially not sensible objections produced by automatic functioning of the mind, but actually insidious distractions.
I think they are related to anxiety in the way they operate. My experience of anxiety was/is like that, anyway -- basically a chronic intrustive worrying train of thought. I ended up finding that I couldn't fight it by "out-logicking" it. I had to take a totally different tack of getting angry with it, or even just getting angry about something unrelated. It seemed to drive out the fear and the intrusive thoughts. My theory is that this is because allowing anger and rage proves to the unconscious that you are not afraid of them, and thus the distraction attempts stop.
You might try somethng like this, rather than trying to mentally figure your way around these distractive thoughts.
--
It's not 100% belief that's required, but 100% commitment. |
| mcone |
Posted - 11/18/2007 : 19:04:52
quote:
Originally posted by armchairlinguist
I'm going to first repeat what I said last time: stop with so damn much analysis. It's not helping you. And also, stop tilting your analysis so that you try to convince yourself something isn't TMS.
This is the message my subconscious needs to hear. If only I could stop that type of thinking so easily...
In all candor, I consciously expend vey considerable mental effort resisting the tendency to analyze,and employing mental techniques to allay fear. The notions that I've shared about my symptoms are largely not the product of willful, volitional thinking on my part. They present (seemingly automatically) as intrusive thoughts that I cannot easily defend against, particularly when the "physical" logic seems so compelling.
Of course you realize that my motivation for posting is not to prove anything physical, but rather to recruit additional voices and reasoning in my battle against the powerful (seemingly automatic) physical thinking.
I greatly appreciate your reply here and the continued guidance on this. |
| armchairlinguist |
Posted - 11/18/2007 : 15:57:27
I'm going to first repeat what I said last time: stop with so damn much analysis. It's not helping you. And also, stop tilting your analysis so that you try to convince yourself something isn't TMS.
1. The nature of the pain is continuous, harsh burning.
This is a possible manifestation of oxygen deprivation. The pain from TMS can be as severe as any other pain. The oxygen deprivation is mild but the pain is severe. Sarno states this multiple times in MBP.
2. Symptoms come on within a day or two of increased activity.
Conditioning. If it was really in response to the activity, it would be immediate (and that could still be conditioning).
3. They seem to respond to *local* icing and anti-inflmmatories
This has nothing to do with TMS. Lots of TMS pain responds to anti-inflammatories and icing. Both directly affect parts of the pain pathway.
4. They diminish after a couple days rest.
Conditioning. Your brain knows that you expect to not have pain if you rest, so you don't.
You are looking for ways that your symptoms don't match, instead of the ways they do. You need to focus on overcoming your fear, not analyzing details of symptoms until your mind is whirling.
--
It's not 100% belief that's required, but 100% commitment. |
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