| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| FORU |
Posted - 09/20/2007 : 16:35:02
To all the kind people that made me feel better about my negative post yesterday. I did initially feel it was a safe place to vent and be honest about feelings - even bad ones!
It's very difficult to get a handle on what is and isn't acceptable to discuss on this board. Our journeys within and the recovery process vary so much from one to the other of us. In a way it is highly personal stuff we're dealing with here! Sometimes it seems the only things we do have in common are the TMS symptoms and the wish to rid ourselves of them!
Still, thinking before speaking (or writing) is a rule I should learn to follow more often. Hey, something else to work on! ;-)
fka something else |
| 3 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| drziggles |
Posted - 09/20/2007 : 18:57:26
La kevin, you are fairly new here, but part of what other people have been saying is that it is very typical for people with TMS to have a need to fix everyone else, particularly when they "know" the other person has TMS. This is for many reasons, which have been spelled out on other threads, but to some degree it has to do with the very personality traits that predispose someone to having TMS in the first place.
So, FORU, your sentiments are completely normal and rational. Part of coming to grips with this whole thing is learning that you can't fix everyone, no matter how hard you try, and not being able to doesn't make you a bad person. Wanting to doesn't either, but it is setting yourself up for a lifetime of frustration. All you can do is expose people to the TMS concepts, and the rest is up to them. |
| la_kevin |
Posted - 09/20/2007 : 17:16:03
FORU,
Since this has much to do about my response to your other post I guess I feel the need to respond.
1) You didn't need to make a new thread to say thank you, but it's your deal.
2)Against the overwhelming majority on this board who "support" your attitude toward your co worker or whatever, I stick by my feeling that it is childish, selfish, mean, judgmental, and controlling.
3) I am not the boss here, you can say ANYTHING you like, we all can, but I will respond how I see fit if you say something I don't agree with.
4) Thinking before speaking still wouldn't have changed your control issues that you projected on your co worker, that is a psychological issue.
5) You're not a bad person just because you have left your boyfriend because you felt his pain was "giving you pain" and your coworker is "stupid" for believing in the disc diagnosis. No you're not a bad person for that. Maybe selfish, childish, cold, egocentric, controlling, near sighted, and lacking empathy, but bad person.....nah.
Ok I read the other thread you commented on, so now I have to retract some things.
If your boyfriend was abusive, then leaving him was a good choice. You made it seem like his pain was some burden you couldn't deal with so you left out of self preservation.
Your "frustration" with your coworker is normal. Looking on him as "stupid" is something I won't accept. You called him stupid, not me. I can only respond to what you write, not my deal if you choose to write things out before thinking.
But I still maintain that no one is "stupid" for believing in discs. Otherwise we would all be stupid to you in some point in time. You were even "stupid" too once, that was my point.
As you can tell I don't deal with people being called stupid for believing in something because they didn't have the luxury like us to discover a mind/body theory.
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| HellNY |
Posted - 09/20/2007 : 16:42:03
I dont think your post was bad and you dont need to make this veiled apology for it. I understand the feelings you had even if in teh end we all do have to let people decide for themselves. |
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