| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| miche |
Posted - 07/04/2006 : 11:50:28
Any words of wisdom??? I am at my worst, thought I could put a lid on the pain by applying myself to journalling and digging deep, nothing is helping , the thing is I know why I am so stressed out, I know why I am enraged ( tons of reasons for both)I TELL MYSELF THAT I AM USING THE PAIN TO KEEP FROM DOING WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE RIGHT NOW,AT THE SAME TIME I AM STARTING TO DOUBT EVERYTHING ABOUT TMS, even though I was diagnosed with fibro, my pain DOES NOT MOVE AROUND, it is always in my upper back and shoulder blade , neck area, it feels like someone stuck a knife in my left shoulder blade and forgot to remove it, then decided to punch me in the stomach, also words are moving on this page ,very scary, yesterday it looked like the car across the street was moving , yet I knew it wasn't, I read that could happen with fibro yet it never happen to me before, what should I do at this point?? |
| 8 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Singer_Artist |
Posted - 07/05/2006 : 09:43:36
Great post Hillbilly...It helped me alot...And glad Miche you are feeling better from the support of the forum..It is wonderful, no doubt! |
| miche |
Posted - 07/04/2006 : 23:19:07
I am so grateful to all of you for answering , every post has helped me in some way, so many thanks. What I did is leave the house for beginners, I went to the park and felt somewhat better when I got back, I feel that after ten years of looking for answers I am finally on the right track and Neil is right I am too impatient to get better, also knowing that some of you have the same kind of pain has been reassuring somehow. Besides the information and the advice that you have provided, your kindness and caring is heartwarming. Micheline |
| Hillbilly |
Posted - 07/04/2006 : 20:41:50
Hi Miche,
I just want to give you some calming words because I can tell that you need them right about now. I too have the pain in the upper back. It is nearly constant. Mine is on the right side. My neck is also very stiff and feels like I need to crack it every few minutes. This was nearly constant for 16 months. The tension in the neck makes me feel very strange, like my eyes are panning slower than my brain wants them to. It is not a dizziness, more like a lightheadedness, but that isn't accurate either. I think you will recognize the description. Either way, it has almost completely resolved once I resolved that it wasn't going to keep me from doing anything. I can lift weights, do woodworking projects, jog, anything I desire. My pain only comes from sitting and standing still. This means it is tension.
I won't even use "TMS" because I see it thrown around to describe everything from personality quirks to bleeding rectums. Even Dr. Sarno calls it an unfortunate name now that he thinks nerves are primarily involved and so many other benign ailments are part of the same process. I try to tell myself that it is my brain telling me I am pressing too hard on the adrenal accelerator instead of letting life happen. Patience is a virtue I lack tremendously.
It sounds as though you are beating yourself up over your lack of results. This is common of perfectionists like us, no? It is obvious that your nerves are taking a beating from the worry and concern over the symptoms, and you keep giving yourself jolts from the adrenals when you get upset. I know, 'cause I did it 24/7 for over a year. But getting upset over the pain only brings on more. This is, I think, irrefutable fact. Once I faced this fact and caught myself getting upset, I stopped it. I used my energies to find something else to focus on and I got the results I wanted. I notice the pain only when I fall into the old trap I set for myself by trying to live the next 35 years in the next 35 minutes.
Try to just release that grip on yourself. Forgive yourself this meltdown. We all have done it. Try to catch yourself tensing while you sit, stand, drive, etc. Try to be like an old crumpled sock when you are journaling. Stop looking for the destination and relax and enjoy the ride. I believe you will heal much more quickly. Get some sleep and believe you will get better. As Henry Ford once said: "Believe you will or believe you won't. Either way you'll be right."
Blessings,
Neil |
| shari |
Posted - 07/04/2006 : 18:45:38
Miche -- My pains are very similar to yours: sharp stabbing pains between the shoulder blades and radiating around the upper back and neck. I've learned to avoid resting on my back and I wait for the pain to go away, sitting quietly while meditating on my "lists" and wondering which thoughts might have triggered the pains. I keep reminding myself what Sarno says: Becoming active again once the pain is gone may take months. The path to resumption of physical activities without fear is usually slow and uneven. We must bide our time, try and try again, and know that we will prevail in the end. |
| wolf29 |
Posted - 07/04/2006 : 18:26:36
quote:
Originally posted by miche
I TELL MYSELF THAT I AM USING THE PAIN TO KEEP FROM DOING WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE RIGHT NOW,AT THE SAME TIME I AM STARTING TO DOUBT EVERYTHING ABOUT TMS
Then you are not 100% convinced it's TMS.. and that's ok for now. I am the same way at the moment. There's that little 1% in the back of my mind that still thinks it's physical. So I tend to baby my back more than I should. Even though I have witnessed first hand the effects of TMS.
A quick example.. I have some kind of back discomfort almost every day. Except when I am on vacation. When on vacation you would never know I have ever suffered from back pain. Not even a twinge while on vacation. And I go on some active vacations. So I tell myself how could this be if I did happen to have a "physical" problem. It can't. True structural problems would not take a break everytime I go on vacation.
It's the stress of the "real world" that gets the best of me. When back from vacations I start to think about work, finances, traffic, etc. and the back pain instantly returns. I also have a fear of doing certain exercises because I was told I shouldn't do them. Yet while on vacation, I'm moving furniture, picking up heavy bags, slouching, you name it.
So you tell me, is it physical or just TMS. If you've had moments that you've felt great and had no signs of pain, I would say it's definitely TMS as physical problems do not take a break just out of the blue.
Regards |
| Scottydog |
Posted - 07/04/2006 : 13:02:33
"the thing is I know why I am so stressed out, I know why I am enraged ( tons of reasons for both)"
Hmmmm. I always think I know what is causing my TMS (usually blame someone else - which makes it beyond my control which makes it unfixable) however, truthfully it's my inner fears and lack of confidence and not facing up to that that is the problem.
I was blaming the fact that we have to move around from place to place (always seems to be a place I would prefer not to live) for my husband's career. So i'm forced to constantly find new friends, which I'm not good at. The fact that I can't follow my career due to this, I'm 52 so running out of time there. I can't follow my choice of hobbies as it's the wrong climate etc etc etc
It seems reasonable to think that these things are causing my TMS but journalling last night I realised it was my fear of going out and making a success of wherever I live, finding the courage to try a new career, join clubs, take up new hobbies and make friends.
I'm not sure how to get into a more positive frame of mind and change my attitude. At least I know where I need to change.
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| jrnythpst |
Posted - 07/04/2006 : 12:28:55
HI MIche,
I find that finding an alone place (mine is actually usually driving down the road) and then finding some good angst music and singing at the top of your lungs helps. It's very liberating. Since I am normally a very quite person it helps me link to my "wilder" side I guess. I need to get back to my writing and drawing and practicing foregin language (spanish right now but want to take up sign language too), these always helped save I always felt I wasn't good enough. The usual artistic personification I guess, afterall you are your own worst critic! Anyway do something that can help you let it all out. I am still new to this too and so far it doesn't help the pain all that much but it sure helps the mental! Good Luck.
Hugs,
Ali Cat |
| Susie |
Posted - 07/04/2006 : 12:21:45
Miche, alot of people have pain that doesn't move and they always question it. I think as long as your brain is successful in distracting you with one particular pain, it has no need for a different routine. Mine moved when I finally made headway on the original. You sound like you are panicking which is very easy to do. If I were you, I would try to get away from concentrating on it and get busy doing something else. Take up fingerpainting,anything,just find something else to occupy your mind for a few hours. It always seemed to help me. Journaling constantly sometimes reinforces the fear because all you are doing is thinking about your situation. I think Sarno recomends twice a day for about 20 minutes or half hour. |
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