| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| shari |
Posted - 07/01/2006 : 17:53:15
I've been wondering what to do once we recognize our inner rage and its origins. Is it important to try to get rid of the rage, or is simply recognizing it enough? I've reached a point when I can feel all this rage bubbling in me, but after several weeks of daily "meditations", progress is still slow and uneven. |
| 4 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Carolyn |
Posted - 07/02/2006 : 12:00:49
Tennis Tom,
I'm not sure I exactly understood your post but it struck a chord with me. Are you saying that it is because of the process of working on your inner feelings, you have a sense that you have accomplished something and therefore feel better about yourself which diminishes the rage?
I am becoming more aware that anger at my self for being less than perfect is a big source of emotional turmoil for me. I very much judge my self-worth based on what I can say I accomplished both on a daily basis and on a bigger scale. I think it is the daily need to accomplish that causes me the greater problem because it doesn't allow me to feel good about myself when even the littlest thing goes wrong. As I get more tuned into what brings on my pain or just the sort of restless yucky feeling that often precedes an attack, I realize that this has a lot to do with it.
I now notice that I am very easily frustrated and intolerant of even little things not going exactly as I had envisioned them because then I will accomplish less that day than some ideal that I had and I berate myself for it. It also means that I am very uncomfortable with 'down time' because I always feel I should be doing more. When I am away on vacation, I am able to relax because there aren't so many things I think I 'should' be accomplishing but when I am at home, I just cannot relax.
Carolyn |
| tennis tom |
Posted - 07/02/2006 : 09:54:09
Hi Carolyn,
When we face our problems--(more correctly, problem persons)--head-on, we are in the DOING mode. Our culture is based on doing, so doing makes us feel GOOD.
I feel, doing for me, is as powerful, as the placebo effect or the nocebo effect. At the end of my day, i unconsciously, judge my self-worth, by my subjective feelings, of what i accomplished, that day. The next day, the whole circus, begins a new. In our culture, your're only as good as your last shot.
When I was deep into my "significant depression", I was judged NON-PRODUCTIVE--one of the worst pajoratives in our cultural vocabulary.
In retrospect, I was being productive, but in a different way.
It would be nice to live in an ashram, far away from our cultural imperatives--on second thought, I have been to ashrams and the residents acutually have to work quite hard, for their moments of meditation.
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| Carolyn |
Posted - 07/02/2006 : 07:28:02
I'm still not clear on this one either. If it is so important for you to be distracted from all this inner rage, when the distraction goes away, why aren't you just overcome by the emotions?
Something about facing the emotions head on seems to rob them of their power. I guess it takes away your fear of them. Maybe it is similar to how you can be very scared to do something- like give a speech- and have a very strong physical reaction to it (sweating, stomach ache etc) but once you get up there and face that fear, you realize it was nothing to be afraid of at all. After all, fear of public speaking is the number one fear people have and it is really nothing more than a fear of being judged which goes right back to deep feelings of low self-esteem which we don't want to face and therefore we distract ourselves from them with physical symptoms.
Carolyn |
| Singer_Artist |
Posted - 07/01/2006 : 19:51:44
My understanding, and I am far from an expert, is that w/ TMS you do not have to get rid of the feelings that are in the unconscious, you merely have to accept and acknowledge that they exist...and...that your brain (subconscious mind) is using Physical Pain and symptoms as a distraction so that you don't ever feel them...I believe that in therapy, for example, there is a 'bleeding off' so to speak of deeper feelings so that the 'reservoir' of feelings isn't so intense...Hope this helps..
~Karen |
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