T O P I C R E V I E W |
allen_non |
Posted - 05/13/2006 : 15:48:48 Hi everyone, I'm Allen. First, I must tell you that this is an awesome forum. You are all very encouraging, knowledgable, and supportive of each other. Plus, there seems to always be someone online, instead of deserted "after hours". Thank you for being here.
I've been reading this forum for about six weeks now, trying to organize my thoughts & questions so as to not write a novel to be sifted thru. First some history, then my questions.
I'm 44, very good condition, healthy, etc. I have the usual gamut of childhood bad memeories, irritated with society, taxes, ridiculous bosses, slow drivers, you get the picture. I've had low back pain for about 18 years. I'm blessed that it's usually not debillitating, other than occasional attacks which sideline my activities from time to time. My LBP baseline pain increased a level about 2 years ago, then another level about 5 months ago. Been to chiro's, ART practicianers, primary care, muscle relaxers, etc, none of which helped at all.
Finally discovered Sarno thru a Russian Kettlebell sport forum (my sport of practice). Won't bore you with the details, but it's a physically brutal sport which works the core as well a extremeties. Thru reading HBP-Mind body connection, I cut my pain about in half, and was able to resume my workouts without as much fear of crippling myself.
However, the part where Sarno recommended getting checked out for tumors, infections, etc haunted me, so mid-Feb of 2006, I went to my primary care, who sent me to spine surgeon in early March. Had X-rays, which surgeon said looked like I had had a significant spine injury in the past (I never did). Diagnosed w/ degen disc at L1-L2 (almost no disc remaining, but no pain there) and signicant degen @ L5-S1 (most of pain @ that region). Spine doc said surgery was possible & sent me for an MRI, which I went ahead & got, but I haven't gone back to the spine doc.
Up until Oct of 2005, pain was centered in small of back, but after an angry episode, the pain moved from there to my left low back and started including my left hip.
In the past, I've also had shoulder (rotator cuff issues) in both shoulders. Surgery fixed one (legitimate tear from a fall) and cortizone injection fixed the other, but I now believe it to have been a TMS location. Two days before the spine doc appointment, developed ringing in my right ear. Had it checked out, no physical causes to identify, no hearing loss.
I have the classic TMS personality, very driven, my own worst critic, more competitive with myself than with others ("every workout has to be as good or better than the previous, or I'm beside myself"), and on and on. I've learned a lot just from reading HPB and this forum.
OK, here are my initial ?'s, please bear with me-
1- How important is getting a physical eval from a TMS doc? I'm in Georgia, and there is a phsychiatrist here trained by Sarno, but he doesn't do the physicals right now. I also have some "popping" in my low back when I move certain ways, so for me, I want to know there is nothing "loose in there". I fully believe (consciously) in TMS, and I know I've got the "baggage" to feed the disorder. It seems that a lot of the recovery effort requires genuine confidence in the process. The nearest doc I've found that does the physical is Dr. Brady in Orlando. If I can believe that the physical exam is not really needed, and why not, that would go a long way. Or if someone could point me to a "physical TMS" doc closer to Atlanta, that would be great.
2- I've read HBP-MB Connection, and Monte's "Get Rid of Pain in Butt" books, and learned a lot from both. Is there benefit for me to get Sarno's new book "Divided Mind"?
3- I'm not much of a student, so formal journalling would be misery for me, but I'll do it if needed. Ideas, resources, to get me started? I have already started an excel spread sheet trying to list responsibilities, worries, frustrations, past humiliations & failures, etc. to see if anything "jumps out". Nothing yet.
Well, I better stop here for now, or this will be a novel. I appreciate your reading this, and look forward to your advice/ suggestions.
Blessings to all, Allen |
5 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
allen_non |
Posted - 05/14/2006 : 20:18:01 Thanks Johnnyg & Tunza! On the popping in my back, it is right in the area where the chronic pain tends to be. Sometimes the pop gives me a stab of pain, sometimes it doesn't. The popping is relatively new, starting in the last 3-4 weeks.
I know I also have a lot of conditioning which is probably the cause of some of my pain. For example, until about 5 months ago, I was in a job I hated (severely) for 2 years, and I had several "tweak" experiences in my low back. Then it turned into "wake-up pain" in the morning. I'd feel fine going to bed, but wake up so stiff & sore in my low back that I started putting my socks on at night so I wouldn't have to deal with it the next morning.
Now I'm in a job I really like, but the morning pain is still there, although less severe. By mid morning the pain is pretty much gone and by the afternoon, I can do deadlifts & other weight lifting drills.
I'm still reading books, and plan to get Sarno's "Divided Mind" and also Fred Amir's book later this week. In the mean time, any ideas how to decouple (decondition) the link between morning time and back pain? For what it's worth, I also hardly ever dream (that I remember) so I will confess that it could be something else in my subconscious that comes out to trash me in the night, leaving me weak & painful in my low back in the morning. Any ideas or suggestions? (sorry if this is dis-jointed, it's been a long day).
Thanks for reading and for any help you can give.
Allen |
Tunza |
Posted - 05/14/2006 : 14:51:11 Hi Allen,
Just want to comment on the popping. I get an audible "clunk" in my lower back (especially when standing up from sitting down). I get the sensation that something plonks back into place in my lower back. HOWEVER, it never seems to correlate to any back pain I have had. It doesn't hurt and it doesn't happen more often when I am having "an episode". It's just random.
The only thing that seems to correlate to the back pain is my emotional state and certain physical activities that I have come to associate with pain in the past. I have had lots of success in getting the episodes to shorten (journalling my feelings has worked for me because I enjoy writing).
I like Johnny's theory about the popping as I snap, crackle and pop in my shoulders, knees, achilles, elbows, wrists and thumb. Unfortunately if one of these joints snaps too much it becomes painful (drs have said tendonitis) eg my shoulders if I swim. I do believe this is TMS but because it is so painful to swim through it and it starts hurting 24/7 if I push through the pain (or even if I try to build up slowly) this is one area I have yet to work on.
Tunza
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johnnyg |
Posted - 05/13/2006 : 19:35:55 Allen:
I meant to say something about the popping but forgot. I pop everywhere--I'm mr. potato head--everything from my neck to my hips moves sometimes, i even crack my ankles. The popping and flopping is meaningless. My mri showed an l5-s1 bulge like yours. It means nothing; once tumor or other real problems are ruled out, you will realize that soft-tissue is the issue.
Others may disagree, but my theory on popping is that it is directly related to the oxygen deprivation (which some people for reasons I don't understand think isn't the problem), which causes initial muscle tightness that makes you think your bones are being pushed and pulled. Muscular "instability" is really the culprit, but there is no damage to the muscle. Just stick with the TMS therapy and it will gradually get better. Good luck! --J |
allen_non |
Posted - 05/13/2006 : 19:09:05 Thanks John! I'll be getting "Divided Mind" as soon as I can find it locally.
On the issue of "popping" in my back, is there any TMS mechanism which affects the mechanical "workings" of an area which could cause such symptoms? My fear is part of a disc or such flapping around. Heck of a distraction, but I'm trying hard to assign it somehow to the vast array of TMS tricks. -Allen |
johnnyg |
Posted - 05/13/2006 : 16:29:37 Hi:
My 2 cents:
1. this is totally subjective--if you feel you need the diagnosis, then you should get it. I saw a TMS doctor in NJ after I had about 90% pain reduction just from reading HBP and MBP. I thought it was important, but not necessary, for me to hear a physician talk about TMS to me directly. It helped me get to about 95% pain reduction. technically TMS is "supposed" to be diagnosed by a properly trained doctor because it is a physical disorder, but there are plenty or "cured" folks who never had it diagnosed by a Dr.
2. Yes, it cleared up loose ends for me!
3. Journaling is a waste of time to me, just make the list that Dr. Sarno tells you to make in his therapy program described in the Divided Mind. He decided to reprint his actual program that he gives to his patients--go buy the book. |
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