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 Returning to the scene of the crime

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Michele Posted - 08/26/2004 : 08:06:08
I'm convinced my pain is TMS and am working on dredging up the unpleasantness of my childhood to confront my emotions. I live about 4 hours away from my hometown. I left right after age 18, and instead of feeling sadness, I was elated to be "escaping".

I'm having trouble getting distracted when I journal, i.e. job, kids, home, everything.

I had an idea that I would drive back to my hometown, go to my childhood home, my grandparent's home, the high school, etc. and just write and experience the emotions of the area. When I think of those 18 years, I feel extreme sadness and alot of rage. Has anyone done this? Would this be too intense or do you think it would help with a breakthrough?

My parents no longer live there, my grandparents have died, and I really have no reason to go there anymore.
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Dave Posted - 08/26/2004 : 10:29:28
It's not a bad idea, especially if you fear it may be "too intense." That's exactly what TMS is about -- distracting us from feeling those "too intense" emotions. So you can't avoid them, you have to hit them head on. If going back home will stir up some memories, make you scream, make you cry, make you remember things, then it might be a good experience.

Distractions come in many shapes and forms, including your daily life. If you're so busy with your job and kids and home, then you have no time to feel the emotions that get repressed and added to the rage resivoir and eventually come out as physical symptoms. Try your best to make journaling a quiet time when you are focused entirely on your emotions, and shut out the distractions as best as you can.
johnfindlay Posted - 08/26/2004 : 08:46:47
I get back to my hometown about once a year to see my Dad.Last month when I went I was symptom free and felt alotta things too[memories]-once i was back to the grind my TMS flared up-it was "painfully" obvious!

JF
seanf Posted - 08/26/2004 : 08:14:47
Ironically, my TMS started within a month of returning to my hometown to live with my family again. But I think that speaks to the emotional significance of the place. I suppose anything that puts you in closer touch with your emotions is therapeutic under TMS theory, so you might as well go for it. You have nothing to lose, and you might just conjure up emotions or memories you didn't know you had.

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