| T O P I C R E V I E W |
| amymae |
Posted - 05/21/2005 : 22:54:01
Hi everyone,
I have a question about setbacks. I've had back pain for about ten years, but never as severe as what happened 9 weeks ago. Basically, i woke up and 2 minutes later my back "went out." I couldn't stand or walk and had pretty bad muscle spasms in my lower back. I got Dr. sarno's book about 2 weeks after it happened.
I feel like I've made significant improvement w/o really trying but haven't healed completely. Only until the last 3-4 days have I really been applying his techniques and keeping a journal of things that may be bothering me. I feel like my back hurts a lot more today than it has for a while and I am confused as to why that is.
Is it possible that I'm on the verge of something and my TMS is trying to have its last strike. I suppose I'm only about 97% of the way there b/c I still have considerable fear of hurting myself. I mostly have fear of the TMS striking when I'm outside of my home b/c it basically renders me helpless.
Also, about a week or two into reading his book i had pretty bad stomach problems and about 2 weeks ago I got ringing in my ears. The right ear only actually. When I re-read the book I saw the passage about ringing in the ears being a symptom. When I noticed the ringing in the ear I didn't recall reading it in the book. I guess its possible I saw it in the book and that's why it started.
Does anyone have any insight into my concerns. I am so ready to kick this thing and am getting so impatient.
One further thing. I am confused about whether I am supposed to try to acknowledge all the reasons that may be caused or have caused rage or should I try to mellow out and let things not bother me. I can't figure that out.
Thank you so much for your help. Its so great to read the success stories b/c it gives me faith that I'll have my own. Good luck to everyone!!! |
| 14 L A T E S T R E P L I E S (Newest First) |
| Dave |
Posted - 05/25/2005 : 07:45:39
quote:
Originally posted by smth416
Saturday night my neck started hurting and now my muscles are incredibly sore to the touch in all the TMS areas(neck,shoulderblades,buttocks).
The fact that the symptoms are in so many places makes it highly likely that it is TMS.
quote:
Although I have been under alot of stress, it is no less stress than I had last week, so why the severe relapse?
I think maybe I took my recovery for granted, losing sight of the fact that this is a long, hard road to recovery.
Remember, conscious stress has little to do with the onset of TMS symptoms. In fact, during times of acute stress, symptoms may be less likely because you are already distracted enough. TMS tends to strike when things settle down and all the repressed emotions from those stressful events start perculating in your unconscious, or when a stressful event is forthcoming and you're avoiding thinking about it. |
| smth416 |
Posted - 05/24/2005 : 16:30:02
Hi again,
I am suffering through my first bad "setback" since I discovered TMS three months ago.
Saturday night my neck started hurting and now my muscles are incredibly sore to the touch in all the TMS areas(neck,shoulderblades,buttocks).
It feels like I exercised for ten hours straight but I have done no strenuous activity.
Although I have been under alot of stress, it is no less stress than I had last week, so why the severe relapse?
I think maybe I took my recovery for granted, losing sight of the fact that this is a long, hard road to recovery.
Guess I'll read the books again and re-do my "list of stressors" that I had not needed recently. -Al |
| amymae |
Posted - 05/23/2005 : 19:33:09
Thank you everyone- I've found your advice extremely helpful. |
| Dave |
Posted - 05/23/2005 : 07:12:59
quote:
Originally posted by amymae
Is it normal for people to go a year or two w/o pain and then be struck w/ something in a particularly stressful situation??
Absolutely. There are examples in his book of former patients who go on to have surgery on other parts of their bodies only to realize (too late) that it was TMS. |
| klc183 |
Posted - 05/22/2005 : 21:58:58
Hi Amy,
A couple of thoughts. First, my interpretation of what Dr. Sarno said about set backs is that the individuals have not fully accepted at the deepest level that their pain IS TMS and, therefore, they are still thinking physical and this blocks the "cure" from happening. I find that when the pain moves around, I am encouraged because it confirms what Dr. Sarno said -that it is not an injury or bodily incompetence that is causing the pain but an emotional condition. It helps me to actually write and/or say outloud affirmations that my issue is TMS because x moved to y part of the body for no reason.
Another thing is that I know for me there are certain physical pains that cause great anxiety and anger, more so than others, and that is is very helpful for me to try to think of the pain like the pains that cause less anxiety. For example, my very first TMS trigger was a quad/knee tendon issue. Therefore, whenever this flares up, I go into total panic mode because it brings up all these feelings I had several years ago with the initial trigger incident when I was convinced my active life was over, and felt so controlled and helpless. Anyway, I have been working on looking at this pain, when it appears in my right knee how I react to any twinge in my left knee - completely ignoring it as anything significant. Can you think of anything physical that does not cause you any worry or anxiety?
Re: anxiety vs anger. My experience has been that these are very much overlaping with respect to TMS pain. I find that I experience anxiety and anger in reaction to TMS pains, sometimes within minutes of each other.
These are just ideas that I have based on my experience.I am not even sure if they are 100 in line with Dr. Sarno's theory..but I thought I would pass along.
quote:
Originally posted by amymae
Hi everyone- thanks for your responses
Should we be expecting to have set backs for a while? Dr. Sarno seemed to suggest in his book that people who have set backs aren't included in his high "cure" rate. From waht I've read on this forum it seems that many people have setbacks.
Is it normal for people to go a year or two w/o pain and then be struck w/ something in a particularly stressful situation??
Thanks.
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| amymae |
Posted - 05/22/2005 : 18:09:56
Hi everyone- thanks for your responses
Should we be expecting to have set backs for a while? Dr. Sarno seemed to suggest in his book that people who have set backs aren't included in his high "cure" rate. From waht I've read on this forum it seems that many people have setbacks.
Is it normal for people to go a year or two w/o pain and then be struck w/ something in a particularly stressful situation??
Thanks. |
| marytabby |
Posted - 05/22/2005 : 15:32:44
And the point about substitution pain is very true for a lot of us from what I read on here, and from what Sarno warns us to expect. Setbacks are the worst. This weekend I had two. My buttock started yesterday out of nowhere and now that's gone, and I woke up this morning and my side of my neck is making threatening jabs like it's going to spaz on me today. I think I know what caused some of this. I had to sing today for the first time since November. December was when all the debilitating back stuff took its toll on me, and I've done a good job of getting control of it but I think I was a little nervous about performing today in a new band, brand new people I've never played with except at 6 weeks of practice together. My perfectionist personality was probably doing a number on my psyche even though I did not feel that way when the neck was bothering me. If it was the cause/trigger, I can't stress about that. I have a hunch it may have been the trigger, but as others have written, just being aware that something is bothering me is a start at getting it thwarted from a full blown debilitating episode. So now the gig is over, we did well, I did not screw up hardly at all and my neck did not ache whatsoever while performing and being distracted in the moment of more important things, i.e. putting on a good show. Now I'm home and I'm aware of the neck again, and I hope I can accept what it is for what it is, and hopefully not stress about it. I am going to try not to. That's the only thing I can think to do at this very moment. |
| Dave |
Posted - 05/22/2005 : 11:09:28
You answered many of your own questions:
quote:
...I feel like I've made significant improvement w/o really trying but haven't healed completely...
...I still have considerable fear of hurting myself...
...I guess its possible I saw it in the book and that's why it started...
...I am so ready to kick this thing and am getting so impatient...
...I am confused about whether I am supposed to try to acknowledge all the reasons that may be caused or have caused rage...
First of all, you have to really try. Otherwise you can't expect results.
Ignoring the pain is half the battle. You need to increase physical activity despite the pain. This will help you overcome the fear.
Since you still fear injury, it means you have not really accepted the TMS concept. If you did, then you would believe that the pain is psychogenic and therefore there should be no fear of "hurting yourself."
Impatience is your enemy. It is essential to take a long-term view. Treating TMS requires a life-long change in thinking patterns. It is not a magic bullet. Treatment takes time and continued focus. Day-to-day progress is not important. If you try to measure your progress it will only lead to frustration.
Your back has been hurting for 9 weeks, but you really have not been doing the TMS work at all. Follow the treatment suggestions in Dr. Sarno's book ... every day. Accept the pain as a signal that there is something going on in your life that you are not facing up to. Be honest with yourself and try to feel those emotions you've been pushing down. |
| amymae |
Posted - 05/22/2005 : 10:23:30
Dear Laura,
Thank you for your reply. I've been trying to think real hard about my past and I think I might have come out w/ a time line. I had OCD when I was a child until about my teenage years. It was about that time I started to get back pain. It wasn't horrible, just hurt real bad when I was sitting. It would go away and come back. I thought it was b/c I was sleeping on a couch. I also had back shoulder pain that shot down my arm.
I have gone periods where I had no pain at all though. It started again last year when back pain when I sit. Then about 9 weeks ago it woke up and my back "went out." It spasms so bad I thought I'd rather die than live w/ that. Its been getting progressively better but now I have the stomach problems and ringing in the ears. I don't like the ringing, but i'd take it over back pain.
Dr. sarno's theory really makes sense to me and I hope I can finally clear up all the symptoms once and for all. I've read both his books and i just ordered his videos. They were expensive, but I'm just so tired of all this. I hope you are able to kick your symptoms, Laura, and enjoy your daughter's bat mitzvah.
I'm sort of confused about the difference between anger and anxiety. I don't think I'm more angry now than I've been in the past, so why is it worse now? I know I"m more stressed out right now. I'm in law school which is extremely expensive and am about as broke as I've ever been. That's causing a lot of stress, but I don't tink its causing anger. It seems dr. sarno believes its anger and not stress that causes TMS. what do you think???
Thank you and take care,
Amy |
| Laura |
Posted - 05/22/2005 : 10:09:08
Dear Amymae,
Yes, I'm sure many of us have experienced location substitution, at least I know I have. When I first read Sarno's book (MBP) that is when I realized that my dizziness was TMS. It is because I had had so many of the various equivalents over the years and I realized that when I had finally gotten rid of one of them a new one had started. Example - For a really long time, when I first moved to California and converted to Judaism (disappointing my family and causing all hell to break loose) I also started having really bad back problems. I was working for my husband's aunt and uncle, two people I didn't particularly care for, and I was not being paid what I should have and didn't have the guts to stand up for myself. I moved to California from Michigan to start a new life with my fiance and instead we were living with his parents and it was destroying us. You bet I had back pain! We finally got our act together and moved to an apartment and were discussing starting a family. I got an ovarian cyst and then had numerous urological problems which required weekly trips to the urologist for bladder infections (again, another TMS equivalent).
After the urology problem, I began having stomach problems and was diagnosed with Irritable Bowel Syndrome. That went on for awhile, and then it was back to back problems. At some point, ringing in the ears started and it drove me crazy and had me running to doctors for awhile. Then the back problems started again and also TMJ problems, with me running to the chiropractor all the time. A couple years of that and then the dizziness started. Now I have had the dizziness problem for a few years and I wonder what it will be when this finally "burns out." I will tell you it was almost gone for awhile. Then it started up bad again with all the stress I've been under planning my daughter's bat mitzvah (remember, my parents threw a fit when I converted to judaism. In some bizarre way, perhaps I'm repressing guilt over that, who knows.)
Four days ago, I started up with a really bad virus, similar to a head cold but with really bad body aches and a sore throat that feels like knives are being stabbed into it. While I've been sick with this cold, I have BARELY noticed the dizziness. In fact, I didn't get it once all day yesterday and then, in the afternoon, we were talking about how much there is yet to do for the bat mitzvah and I felt "off balance" for a few seconds. So, I know all too well about symptoms relocating to other parts of the body.
Laura
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| amymae |
Posted - 05/22/2005 : 09:43:24
Hi everyone- thanks so much for your insight.
Hiffer- Your golf story made me realize taht I signed up for the gym yesterday (the day it started hurting more). I first attributed my back pain to running. A chiropractor told me it was b/c i didn't stretch my psoas muscle well enough. I think that sounds crazy in retrospect. I don't think a lack of stretching could cause the back spasms.
Anyhow, I'm trying to remain positive. Its difficult b/c I still fear the back pain. I'm tryin to not focus on it.
Has anyone here experienced what Dr. Sarno called location substitution. I've experienced stomach trouble and ringing in the ear since I started his program. I'm thinking maybe my back is getting better so it needs somewhere else to go. Just my theory, does anyone have any insight.
Thanks again,
Amy |
| ssjs |
Posted - 05/22/2005 : 08:30:47
sometimes, just when you think you are getting ahead, something tries to pull you back. That seems to be how the mind works.
As for me...to acknowledge that you are bothered, even if you are not sure by what...is the key.
Trying to be mellow when you are seething...is the problem.
Sarno said at one of his lecture...LIFE IS STRESSFUL. You cannot get rid of the stress. JUST KNOW THAT.
Sandy
17+ years free of pain |
| Baseball65 |
Posted - 05/22/2005 : 08:14:58
quote:
should I try to mellow out and let things not bother me.
Hi Amymae
You wouldn't have TMS if you knew how to DO this! I came home from a very stressful 'event' yesterday and announced to the world that I was "done" for the day and that everybody better leave me alone....I was 'relaxing' and 'checking out' and you all can just find someone else to bother...this was at 2 O'clock PM
So...at 10:30 PM when I finally finished everything I needed to do(Clean the house,drop the kids off at the picnic,type up some letters and make 3 long phone calls)..
You get the point...we don't know HOW to mellow out..it's inherent in our personality,and TMS isn't the result...it too is just a piece of a very complex and dynamic personality profile.
Studying the paradox of our personalities will bring a degree of understanding and the symptoms will cease...trying to relax? Hell...if we could do that we wouldn't have ended up here!
peace
Baseball65 |
| hiffer |
Posted - 05/22/2005 : 03:12:38
"I feel like my back hurts a lot more today than it has for a while and I am confused as to why that is.
Is it possible that I'm on the verge of something and my TMS is trying to have its last strike. I suppose I'm only about 97% of the way there b/c I still have considerable fear of hurting myself. I mostly have fear of the TMS striking when I'm outside of my home b/c it basically renders me helpless."
Amymae, I'm a rookie at this but my symptoms are lower to mid back pain, occasionally accompanied by numbness in the left leg. The numbness is the real scary one because it reminds me of an earlier back surgery that I went through (spinal stenosis was the 'official' diagnosis). Anyway, after weeks of journaling, analyzing, emoting,etc., I made a date to play a casual game of tennis (the physical and competitive outlet that I love the most)---nothing over the top, just a friendly workout. The back pain had intially shut me down physically, and I wanted to try and get moving again. The morning of my match, guess which symptom appeared? Of course, it had to be (for me) the scary one, out in full force. But the knowledge and the faith that I've gained via the Sarno material ( and reading about experiences of others) allowed me to view the potentially paralysing symptom with a sort of amusement as opposed to full blown fear. I played. It went away. The numbness has not appeared again. I've gradually increased my physical output with slow, but steady progress.
As for 'figuring it out', I've found that, for me, the process is more important than the "a ha! that's the cause of it!" solution. Is it job? My wife? My father? An undiscovered childhood incident? All of the above? I don't know if there's a blueprint for the question of 'should I scream or just let it go'. Personal introspection may be painful and time consuming, for others, it may be quick and relatively easy. I'm not an expert here, but repeating and reviewing the material/concepts helps me a lot. I don't know if I'll be pain free tomorrow, next week, next year---for me, counting the days puts on an extra stress that I don't need.
Anyway, that's a capsule of my experience, and like yourself, I enjoy and learn a lot from the experiences of others. Good luck with the journey! |
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